[X&Y Emily] Can I Stop Feeling Jealousy?
Published: Fri, 04/03/15
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WHAT'S INSIDE: Jealousy has this wicked way of creeping into our
relationships, doesn't it? Here's what to be on the lookout for...
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And now, here's the second part of my series on jealousy...
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CAN I STOP FEELING JEALOUSY?
When we talked last time I shared with you some ways to recognize
jealousy when it makes an appearance in your life.
All too often emotions of jealousy come up not because a man has
made us feel this way but rather from our insecurities that may
have developed over the years.
But if we can pinpoint where that jealousy is coming from that can
help us to work toward getting rid of that clearly unpleasant
feeling.
So that's exactly what we'll cover today.
Past experiences can mold how we think and feel, so let's look at
some specific types of past experiences that you may possibly have
encountered along the way.
As you read, give each point some serious thought. Can you relate
to any, or even all?
1. FAMILY HISTORY: Maybe Dad cheated on Mom. Or perhaps
uncles, grandfathers and/or male family friends were known to cheat
on their wives.
For many, it was or is still seen as okay for men to cheat just as
long as they did not make it obvious to the wife, friends and
family.
Understandably, this could lead a woman to believe that all men
cheat sooner or later. After all, if dad cheated on mom what's not
to say that our husbands/boyfriends aren't going to cheat on us too?
2. PAST DATING EXPERIENCES: Has your ex-boyfriend(s) or
For many, it was or is still seen as okay for men to cheat just as
long as they did not make it obvious to the wife, friends and
family.
Understandably, this could lead a woman to believe that all men
cheat sooner or later. After all, if dad cheated on mom what's not
to say that our husbands/boyfriends aren't going to cheat on us too?
2. PAST DATING EXPERIENCES: Has your ex-boyfriend(s) or
husband cheated on you in the past?
If so, without a doubt this can be a life changing event emotionally
If so, without a doubt this can be a life changing event emotionally
for you, since at one time or another you have put your trust in
someone you loved--just to end up being let down and possibly
feeling like a fool for being so trusting.
If this is the case, please remember that not all men cheat. And
it would not be fair to punish yourself OR a great man in your life
just because someone else has violated your trust.
True...to put trust in someone may leave you feeling vulnerable.
However, if you know how to pick out a great man with high
character then trusting him should become easier over time.
Having a man in your life who is trustworthy can calm that nagging
feeling of jealousy.
Jealousy can actually become a HABIT if left unchecked over time,
can't it?
3. YOUR BOYFRIEND'S PAST DATING EXPERIENCES: If your
If this is the case, please remember that not all men cheat. And
it would not be fair to punish yourself OR a great man in your life
just because someone else has violated your trust.
True...to put trust in someone may leave you feeling vulnerable.
However, if you know how to pick out a great man with high
character then trusting him should become easier over time.
Having a man in your life who is trustworthy can calm that nagging
feeling of jealousy.
Jealousy can actually become a HABIT if left unchecked over time,
can't it?
3. YOUR BOYFRIEND'S PAST DATING EXPERIENCES: If your
boyfriend has cheated on his ex-girlfriend(s) or wife in his past that's
a very real red flag, isn't it?
...Even if it may have been YOU that he cheated on her with. Let
that one sink in for a minute.
Naturally, this would leave a woman to worry that he may end up
cheating again...and that's a reasonable expectation.
As such, it's also reasonable why these intense feelings of
jealousy can pop up each time he leave to run errands or is late
come home from work.
Even though a man like this maybe faithful now, only time will help
you release those feelings once he has proven to continuously be
trustworthy. And it's going to take a LOT of time.
Welcome to why cheating hurts EVERYONE involved. If you really
want to avoid jealousy, the simple plan is this: Avoid men who
cheat...period.
4. YOUR INFIDELITY IN THE PAST: If you have had (or are
...Even if it may have been YOU that he cheated on her with. Let
that one sink in for a minute.
Naturally, this would leave a woman to worry that he may end up
cheating again...and that's a reasonable expectation.
As such, it's also reasonable why these intense feelings of
jealousy can pop up each time he leave to run errands or is late
come home from work.
Even though a man like this maybe faithful now, only time will help
you release those feelings once he has proven to continuously be
trustworthy. And it's going to take a LOT of time.
Welcome to why cheating hurts EVERYONE involved. If you really
want to avoid jealousy, the simple plan is this: Avoid men who
cheat...period.
4. YOUR INFIDELITY IN THE PAST: If you have had (or are
having) an affair on the side either now or in the past then it could
cause you to worry that he may be doing the same also.
If this rings a bell for you, have you made the personal vow to
change your patterns? Are you confident you're not a "serial
cheater"?
It really is all up to you. You have the power.
Knowing that you will not make that mistake again can help ease
those leftover feelings of unfounded jealousy over time.
If you're like most women, you can relate pretty strongly to one or
more of these first four factors I've described.
Next time I'll reveal three more to you. Stay tuned!
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(c) X & Y Communications LLC, 2015. All Rights Reserved.
1-on-1 Coaching With Scot And Emily
How Emily Met The Man Of Her Dreams, And YOU Can Too
This e-mail newsletter is a free service of X & Y Communications.
It is never sent to those who have not asked for it. If you
believe you have been sent this message in error, please use the
link below to quickly and securely remove yourself from our
mailing list.
If this rings a bell for you, have you made the personal vow to
change your patterns? Are you confident you're not a "serial
cheater"?
It really is all up to you. You have the power.
Knowing that you will not make that mistake again can help ease
those leftover feelings of unfounded jealousy over time.
If you're like most women, you can relate pretty strongly to one or
more of these first four factors I've described.
Next time I'll reveal three more to you. Stay tuned!
=====
(c) X & Y Communications LLC, 2015. All Rights Reserved.
1-on-1 Coaching With Scot And Emily
How Emily Met The Man Of Her Dreams, And YOU Can Too
This e-mail newsletter is a free service of X & Y Communications.
It is never sent to those who have not asked for it. If you
believe you have been sent this message in error, please use the
link below to quickly and securely remove yourself from our
mailing list.