[X&Y Emily] More Ways Jealousy Can Creep Into Your Life...
Published: Sun, 04/24/16
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WHAT'S INSIDE: Here are three more devious ways that jealousy can
make your life miserable...often before you even realize what's happened.
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YOU'LL NEVER HAVE FELT BETTER
Right now Scot and I are actually in Cappadocia, Turkey
exploring with the kiddos and having a great time.
But you know what's one of the most unexpected and
amazing parts of traveling outside the U.S.?
It's that when we eat more fresh veggies, organic chicken,
etc. and less of the crazy stuff out there like high fructose
corn syrup, artificial sweeteners and the like we feel SO
much better.
Why? Because so much of the "food" we eat in our post-modern
U.S. lifestyle is not even food at all.
Countless other people are, like us, getting "fed up"...quite
literally.
And that's why Paleo is sweeping the nation.
But how do you get started? That’s where your free limited
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MORE WAYS JEALOUSY CAN CREEP INTO YOUR LIFE
As you'll recall, last time we talked about four scenarios that tend to
cause jealous feelings to arise.
It really is true that as we our experiences in life have a lasting
impact on us. Hopefully, those experiences build us up rather than
leaving us damaged.
Do you let broken relationships you've had with men who turned out
to be less than perfect scar you emotionally?
Or do you treat them as learning experiences that will help you
recognize a better man in the future?
I believe we all want to claim the latter. And as such, it's all the more
important (amazingly so, even) to root out ways jealousy can establish
itself in our minds and wreak havoc on even solid relationships.
As promised, here are three more situations to look out for:
5. You Trust Your Man, But You Don't Trust Other Women:
The feeling may creep in that women are out to get your man and that he
is weak enough to fall for it.
Make no mistake about it. There are women who are attracted to men
who are taken and gain a thrill out of winning over another woman's guy.
But in the end, that's their problem not yours...if you are with the right
man.
Most men are strong enough to see what is happening and to refuse such
advances. This is especially when his emotional and physical needs are
being met...by YOU.
Men who are in healthy and happy relationship do not want to jeopardize
that. They're indeed as sensible and smart as you are, if you're indeed a
woman who deserves what she wants and has gotten it.
In most case those type of men would be upset that a woman would try
to break up his happy life.
is weak enough to fall for it.
Make no mistake about it. There are women who are attracted to men
who are taken and gain a thrill out of winning over another woman's guy.
But in the end, that's their problem not yours...if you are with the right
man.
Most men are strong enough to see what is happening and to refuse such
advances. This is especially when his emotional and physical needs are
being met...by YOU.
Men who are in healthy and happy relationship do not want to jeopardize
that. They're indeed as sensible and smart as you are, if you're indeed a
woman who deserves what she wants and has gotten it.
In most case those type of men would be upset that a woman would try
to break up his happy life.
6. Settling:
If you make the mistake of feeling like he could do better than you but has
"settled" then it could stand to reason that your point of view could be that
he is waiting for someone better to come along.
That is a horrible feeling, isn't it?
You're left always wondering who he would rather be with, or perpetually
worried that a "more perfect" woman will show up tomorrow.
The real question is, "Does he feel like he is really settling or is the reality
that he indeed does see you as that great woman in his life?" If he's telling
you so--or better yet acting like it's so--why not take him at face value?
He really could think you are the greatest woman he has ever met, you
know.
If this is the case--and you can believe it--your way of thinking on this
matter could in time push him away.
Remind yourself that he chose you over of all the other millions of women
on this planet. And as a rational human being, he probably knew what he was doing.
However, if you find that he is feeling like maybe he has settled than now
is the time to found out what is missing in the relationship.
Perhaps it is an easier fix than you might think.
For example, maybe he would like more excitement and more time with you.
An easy fix in that situation is to make sure you have at least one date night
a month or drive to an interesting place you both have never been before
every once in a while.
"settled" then it could stand to reason that your point of view could be that
he is waiting for someone better to come along.
That is a horrible feeling, isn't it?
You're left always wondering who he would rather be with, or perpetually
worried that a "more perfect" woman will show up tomorrow.
The real question is, "Does he feel like he is really settling or is the reality
that he indeed does see you as that great woman in his life?" If he's telling
you so--or better yet acting like it's so--why not take him at face value?
He really could think you are the greatest woman he has ever met, you
know.
If this is the case--and you can believe it--your way of thinking on this
matter could in time push him away.
Remind yourself that he chose you over of all the other millions of women
on this planet. And as a rational human being, he probably knew what he was doing.
However, if you find that he is feeling like maybe he has settled than now
is the time to found out what is missing in the relationship.
Perhaps it is an easier fix than you might think.
For example, maybe he would like more excitement and more time with you.
An easy fix in that situation is to make sure you have at least one date night
a month or drive to an interesting place you both have never been before
every once in a while.
7. Low Self-Esteem:
Do you ever get the feeling that another women is prettier or even better
than you? I'm sure we've all been there at one time or another.
While this point is similar to the one above, it really is a separate subject
unto itself.
A woman with low self-esteem by definition believes that others are better
than she is.
Since we see the world though our own eyes that is how we tend to perceive
the world to be in everyone else's eyes also.
So in a woman with low self-esteem's mind how can a man see her as better
than she sees herself?
It's not until she can see herself the way he sees her that she can feel more
secure.
Now another problem with low self-esteem is that it there are often times
past experiences like we talked about above and last time that have happened.
Those experiences add to the stress of jealousy.
Unfortunately, a current boyfriend who is trustworthy and faithful can get
accused of cheating based solely on unresolved issues we are dealing with.
That's not fair to him, and if you think about it it's not very fair to you either.
How will you ever discover a good man if you always think the worst of every
guy you meet?
than you? I'm sure we've all been there at one time or another.
While this point is similar to the one above, it really is a separate subject
unto itself.
A woman with low self-esteem by definition believes that others are better
than she is.
Since we see the world though our own eyes that is how we tend to perceive
the world to be in everyone else's eyes also.
So in a woman with low self-esteem's mind how can a man see her as better
than she sees herself?
It's not until she can see herself the way he sees her that she can feel more
secure.
Now another problem with low self-esteem is that it there are often times
past experiences like we talked about above and last time that have happened.
Those experiences add to the stress of jealousy.
Unfortunately, a current boyfriend who is trustworthy and faithful can get
accused of cheating based solely on unresolved issues we are dealing with.
That's not fair to him, and if you think about it it's not very fair to you either.
How will you ever discover a good man if you always think the worst of every
guy you meet?
If you find that you are experiencing any of these issues we've covered in this
newsletter and the last, then it's important to work on resolving them.
You will find that your relationship, and your life itself can only become
happier.
Understanding why we are jealous is a start.
However it is not so easy to just say "stop being jealous", is it? After all,
sometimes there's good reason for what we're feeling.
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