[X&Y Emily] What To Do If You're "Sitting By The Phone"
Published: Sun, 04/21/19
WHAT'S INSIDE: Have you ever found yourself stereotypically
"waiting by the phone" for a guy to call? Well, maybe notliterally, but a guy sure can get inside your head, can't he?
Here's what to do...
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SUMMERTIME IS ALMOST HERE...AND THERE'S NO
BETTER TIME TO MEET A GREAT GUY
BETTER TIME TO MEET A GREAT GUY
Can you believe that summer is almost HERE already?
This is the time of year where we tend to do even MORE fun things
than at other times of the year like taking vacations, going to the
beach, hanging out by the pool, playing tennis and the list goes on.
Since everyone tends to be out and about and more active in general
during summer, why not find a great guy and give him the distinct
privilege of doing all of those fun types of things with YOU?
Walking in the park listening to the crickets, enjoying moonlit
concerts, having a glass of Chardonnay together on an outdoor
patio. How much romantic fun can you have?
It's only limited by your imagination, really...and his.
So knowing we're almost to May already, I'd have to say that the
very best way to find a great guy FAST is to try online dating.
very best way to find a great guy FAST is to try online dating.
If you haven't ever given it a whirl, let me tell you...you're really
missing out on a terrific way to meet men.
I personally met Scot online and I can show YOU how to find a
good man of your own in less than 30 days using my plan in Click
With Him:
I know first-hand the power of online dating, and since summer
is actually almost here I wanted to be sure to give you a chance
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The best thing about Click With Him is that I not only show you how
to set up your profile and screen guys online, I show you how to be
at your absolute best so you'll get EXACTLY the kind of guys
talking to you that you'd like to meet.
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WHAT TO DO IF YOU'RE "WAITING BY THE PHONE"
OK, we're all adults here so I'm not about to presume that any of
us are actually, really "sitting by the phone" waiting for a guy to
call us. This isn't seventh grade anymore.
But realistically speaking, by far one of the most frustrating
things in the whole wide world of dating is when a man SAYS he's
going to call you...and doesn't.
Now, if he leaves the whole idea of calling you open-ended, that's
one thing.
But to be honest, if he's apparently thoughtful enough to set up a
particular time to call you and THEN fails to do so, it's even more
of a head scratcher.
Having scheduled your time accordingly so you'd be ready when he
calls, you really can be left feeling like you were duped into
"sitting by the phone".
Well, here's the thing.
I COULD recommend that you take the "velvet hammer" approach and
warn every man you meet sternly that you've been disappointed too
many times already and that you've got a "one strike and he's out"
policy when it comes to men who promise to call and don't. So he'd
better call you like he promises if he ever expects to see you
again.
I COULD also recommend that if and when he "flakes" on you to pick
up the phone yourself and CALL HIM...probably with a terse inquiry up
front as to why he didn't bother to call.
But you can probably already sense that neither of those ideas
would work in your favor...at all. You'd come off as defensive and
even a little bit desperate, frankly.
Nope. When you meet a man and he says he'll call you, it's best to
simply smile and say something to the effect of, "Thanks. I'll
look forward to that."
You want to remain friendly and attractive, of course, and it's
certainly not a bad idea to let a guy know that you're likely to
answer the phone when he calls.
After all, you might be surprised at how many guys actually "fail
to deploy" when it's time to pick up the phone because they either
draw a blank as to what to say or they fear the "rejection" of
having been given a fake number, etc.
So a HINT of approval--without going overboard--can indeed serve you
well up front.
But truth be told, guys can indeed "flake out" because they simply
aren't really as interested in you as you may have hoped.
Importantly, this might not have much to do with YOU at all.
There is a lot of "gray area" when it comes to dating and
attraction, and there are numerous convoluted reasons why a guy
wouldn't call you.
For example, what if he actually HAS a girlfriend already and got a
stroke of conscience shortly after meeting you and suggesting a
phone conversation?
Or for all you know he may have met his soulmate right after
meeting you.
I'm sure that sounds farfetched, but Scot and I BOTH had gone on a
date with someone we really liked a day or two before meeting each
other! ...And both of us canceled our respective second dates with
those people.
We had the common decency to actually CALL them and tell them, but
not everyone is like that nowadays, unfortunately.
That, of course, brings up the valid point that if a man SAYS he's
going to call you and DOESN'T you may have saved yourself the pain
of getting into a relationship with a guy who just simply lacks
character.
We as women tend to LOVE a man who has a strong cornerstone of
character. He does what he says he's going to do, and usually
that's an EXCELLENT indication that he'd be a good protector and
provider.
I mean, how safe do we feel around a guy who's unpredictable at his
very core?
But enough about the guy. Let's turn our attention to YOU now.
Here's the basic truth at play here. If you meet a man who you
like, it's perfectly natural for you to look forward to his call.
In fact, if you DON'T, my educated guess is that YOU probably
weren't all that excited about him to begin with.
Let's face it...if you FORGET that he was going to call you, then you
really haven't exactly been "sitting by the phone" even in the
figurative sense, right?
But assuming you have met a man you're a bit excited about, you'll
be LESS concerned about whether that ONE PARTICULAR guy calls you
back or not if you see yourself as a woman who has OPTIONS when it
comes to who she dates.
If you see yourself as a CHOOSER, you'll invest far less emotion in
a guy so early on.
That alone will allow you to relax and "go with the flow". If he
calls you as he said he would, that's great. If he doesn't, you're
probably better off anyway...just like I said.
And now the magical part...
If you can adopt this mindset as your own you'll actually SOUND
more relaxed and more attractive on the phone when he DOES call
you, as opposed to being overly tense or nervous.
This will in turn put the guy more at ease while causing him to
feel greater attraction for you. The conversation can't help but
go more smoothly that way, right?
So when you look at the big picture, EVERYTHING tends to work for
the better when we obsess less about whether or not a guy calls us
or not. How powerful is that?
Have Fun,
Emily McKay
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Questions? Ideas? Comments? Feel free to write me anytime at:
emily@clickwithhim.com.
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