[X&Y Emily] How To Put An End To "Hurt, Angry And Confused"
Published: Fri, 04/16/10
EMILY McKAY'S KEYS TO BLISS NEWSLETTER
=====
WHAT'S INSIDE: Has the last guy in your life really affected your
mindset in not-so-positive a way? Here's how to get back on track,
girl!
====
YOU'VE JUST GOT TO DESERVE WHAT YOU WANT
When you read the e-mail I'm about to share with you it may shock
you to your core.
In fact, it may even conjure up memories that bring a tear to your
eye.
And it MAY even go so far as to serve as a "wake up call" if you can
in some way relate RIGHT now to what Hannah has written to me.
But I encourage you to stay tuned for my answer that follows--even
if Hannah's message is particularly painful to read.
Ladies, if you are a woman with a terrific heart your lot in life is
NOT to settle for a man who treats you poorly and then manipulates
you into sticking around.
For Scot and I our core message is exactly that: Deserve What You
Want and NEVER EVER SETTLE.
In fact, if you haven't read the women's version of Scot's terrific
book, I'd say that doing so could be the single biggest "game
changer" for you this year:
Deserve What You Want
For your convenience, the audio book version is included also...
along with some super bonuses.
If you really, truly are interested in putting the past behind you,
figuring out what you want in a man, finding out how to get exactly
that, and then MAKING IT HAPPEN...this is where you'll find the
answers you've been looking for in far greater detail than any
newsletter can provide:
Deserve What You Want
And now, here's Hannah's heart-wrenching letter to us:
=====
HOW TO PUT AN END TO "HURT, ANGRY AND CONFUSED"
Hi Scot and Emily,
my name is hannah and i am at a loss. this is a pretty long email,
but im hoping you can help me understand.
i have been at with this man for about 4yrs....well was.
i can honestly say he is the only man i have truly loved. we have
had our share of ups and downs but when it was good, it was great.
but there was a period of time where we didn't talk or see each other
for months at a time bc he had a certain problem he couldnt control.
back in january he got in contact with me out of the blue saying that
he loves me, misses me, cares about me, cant stop thinking about me
and that he only wanted to be with me.
we are trying to work things out, or at least that's what he told me
he wanted to do.
3 wks ago, we spent friday and saturday and a little bit of sunday
together laughing having a good time, talking about serious and not
so serious things, he cooked for me when he thought i was hungry
and he even said to me he wanted me to have have his baby.
when i called him on monday, he text me saying that i wasn't trust
worthy and when i asked him what he was talking about, i got another
txt msg from a "woman" sent from his phone saying hes my husband
stay away from him, all these horrible, hurtful things.
i know hes not married, and even if he was seeing someone else, why
not just be honest with me? i know i shouldn't question myself
about what i did wrong because i know i didn't do anything wrong
but at the same time i cant help but feel that way.
reality wise, as sad as this is about to sound, i cant imagine being
with anyone but him.
i can respect the fact that there is a reason for all this happening
but there is something i just dont understand: why say and do all
those things if i wasn't what he wanted? why couldn't he be honest
with me?
please help me...i really don't know what to make of this.... i
have told this situation to a number of guy friends of mine, even
my female friends ask their male friends and they all tell me the
same thing....he's an a******, or a jerk.
true as that maybe, i saw something inside of him that no one else
saw. and it made me fall in love with him.
hope your eyes arent tired and it didnt make you run from the
computer screaming,
hannah
=====
Hannah, I can tell by the way you write that you've really let this
guy affect you deeply...and not for the better.
But the truth is that you have answered all of your own questions.
I'm simply here to reassure you that you have both the power AND the
right to make your own decisions for your own well-being.
This guy is beyond jerkiness. He's flat out unstable. Both Scot
and I found ourselves married to mentally ill spouses once upon a
time, and all we can tell you is RUN AWAY.
I understand there has been an investment of time and emotion, and
with that comes greater hurt after a breakup. But you've got to
tell yourself two very key things and believe them fully:
1) You deserve WAY better than this relationship will ever offer
2) You cannot CHANGE this guy
Believe me. I fully get that there are "good times". That's one
classic way epic manipulators keep people like you coming back for
more.
But when you tell me that he's got a history of having "a certain
problem he can't control" and then you go on to relate all the
emotional/practical weirdness you've shared below, it signals without
a doubt that it really is time to move on.
I promise you that finding someone better (and in this case WAY
better) is a lot easier than you think it is.
You can form a terrific connection with someone you click with over
the course of just a couple of dates and really get a feel that it
could go somewhere positive and wonderful.
But you're going to have to open yourself up to the possibility of
freeing yourself from this guy--both physically and emotionally--in
order to make that happen.
I understand that you may feel "love" for him now and that you may
not be able to see yourself with anyone else.
But it's remarkable how when that "someone else" shows up you end up
wondering how you could have ever seen yourself staying with the
other person.
Have Fun,
Emily McKay
=====
Questions? Ideas? Comments? Feel free to write me anytime at:
emily@clickwithhim.com.
Your feedback is welcome. If you like what you read, please feel
free to forward the newsletter to others. That's how we build our
audience!
Did a friend forward you this message? To receive this free
newsletter on finding the right man online OR offline from X & Y
Communications on a regular basis, simply click on this link:
=====
WHAT'S INSIDE: Has the last guy in your life really affected your
mindset in not-so-positive a way? Here's how to get back on track,
girl!
====
YOU'VE JUST GOT TO DESERVE WHAT YOU WANT
When you read the e-mail I'm about to share with you it may shock
you to your core.
In fact, it may even conjure up memories that bring a tear to your
eye.
And it MAY even go so far as to serve as a "wake up call" if you can
in some way relate RIGHT now to what Hannah has written to me.
But I encourage you to stay tuned for my answer that follows--even
if Hannah's message is particularly painful to read.
Ladies, if you are a woman with a terrific heart your lot in life is
NOT to settle for a man who treats you poorly and then manipulates
you into sticking around.
For Scot and I our core message is exactly that: Deserve What You
Want and NEVER EVER SETTLE.
In fact, if you haven't read the women's version of Scot's terrific
book, I'd say that doing so could be the single biggest "game
changer" for you this year:
Deserve What You Want
For your convenience, the audio book version is included also...
along with some super bonuses.
If you really, truly are interested in putting the past behind you,
figuring out what you want in a man, finding out how to get exactly
that, and then MAKING IT HAPPEN...this is where you'll find the
answers you've been looking for in far greater detail than any
newsletter can provide:
Deserve What You Want
And now, here's Hannah's heart-wrenching letter to us:
=====
HOW TO PUT AN END TO "HURT, ANGRY AND CONFUSED"
Hi Scot and Emily,
my name is hannah and i am at a loss. this is a pretty long email,
but im hoping you can help me understand.
i have been at with this man for about 4yrs....well was.
i can honestly say he is the only man i have truly loved. we have
had our share of ups and downs but when it was good, it was great.
but there was a period of time where we didn't talk or see each other
for months at a time bc he had a certain problem he couldnt control.
back in january he got in contact with me out of the blue saying that
he loves me, misses me, cares about me, cant stop thinking about me
and that he only wanted to be with me.
we are trying to work things out, or at least that's what he told me
he wanted to do.
3 wks ago, we spent friday and saturday and a little bit of sunday
together laughing having a good time, talking about serious and not
so serious things, he cooked for me when he thought i was hungry
and he even said to me he wanted me to have have his baby.
when i called him on monday, he text me saying that i wasn't trust
worthy and when i asked him what he was talking about, i got another
txt msg from a "woman" sent from his phone saying hes my husband
stay away from him, all these horrible, hurtful things.
i know hes not married, and even if he was seeing someone else, why
not just be honest with me? i know i shouldn't question myself
about what i did wrong because i know i didn't do anything wrong
but at the same time i cant help but feel that way.
reality wise, as sad as this is about to sound, i cant imagine being
with anyone but him.
i can respect the fact that there is a reason for all this happening
but there is something i just dont understand: why say and do all
those things if i wasn't what he wanted? why couldn't he be honest
with me?
please help me...i really don't know what to make of this.... i
have told this situation to a number of guy friends of mine, even
my female friends ask their male friends and they all tell me the
same thing....he's an a******, or a jerk.
true as that maybe, i saw something inside of him that no one else
saw. and it made me fall in love with him.
hope your eyes arent tired and it didnt make you run from the
computer screaming,
hannah
=====
Hannah, I can tell by the way you write that you've really let this
guy affect you deeply...and not for the better.
But the truth is that you have answered all of your own questions.
I'm simply here to reassure you that you have both the power AND the
right to make your own decisions for your own well-being.
This guy is beyond jerkiness. He's flat out unstable. Both Scot
and I found ourselves married to mentally ill spouses once upon a
time, and all we can tell you is RUN AWAY.
I understand there has been an investment of time and emotion, and
with that comes greater hurt after a breakup. But you've got to
tell yourself two very key things and believe them fully:
1) You deserve WAY better than this relationship will ever offer
2) You cannot CHANGE this guy
Believe me. I fully get that there are "good times". That's one
classic way epic manipulators keep people like you coming back for
more.
But when you tell me that he's got a history of having "a certain
problem he can't control" and then you go on to relate all the
emotional/practical weirdness you've shared below, it signals without
a doubt that it really is time to move on.
I promise you that finding someone better (and in this case WAY
better) is a lot easier than you think it is.
You can form a terrific connection with someone you click with over
the course of just a couple of dates and really get a feel that it
could go somewhere positive and wonderful.
But you're going to have to open yourself up to the possibility of
freeing yourself from this guy--both physically and emotionally--in
order to make that happen.
I understand that you may feel "love" for him now and that you may
not be able to see yourself with anyone else.
But it's remarkable how when that "someone else" shows up you end up
wondering how you could have ever seen yourself staying with the
other person.
Have Fun,
Emily McKay
=====
Questions? Ideas? Comments? Feel free to write me anytime at:
emily@clickwithhim.com.
Your feedback is welcome. If you like what you read, please feel
free to forward the newsletter to others. That's how we build our
audience!
Did a friend forward you this message? To receive this free
newsletter on finding the right man online OR offline from X & Y
Communications on a regular basis, simply click on this link:
Subscribe To This Newsletter
...and sign up. Or, just send a blank e-mail emily@aweber.com.
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