[X&Y Emily] Do Divorced Women Get More Dates?
Published: Fri, 06/06/08
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DESERVE WHAT YOU WANT (WOMEN'S EDITION):
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(Finally...How To Get What You DO Want Instead Of Simply Avoiding
What You DON'T Want)
CLICK WITH HIM:
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(The Right Man For You...Online OR Offline)
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IN THIS EDITION: Do women who are divorced get more dates than
women who have never been married?
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A SPECIAL F-R-E-E AUDIO FOR YOU: Our friend Amy Waterman from
Meet Your Sweet has just finished her brand-new course entitled
"From First Dates To Soul Mates".
Amy is one sharp cookie and always loads of fun. So Scot recently
sat down with her for an interview to talk about the subject of
"What Kind Of Women Men Commit To".
Let me tell you, there are some AMAZING ideas in this brief twelve
minute audio that might cause you to think about things as you never
have before. More importantly, they could REVOLUTIONIZE your
attractiveness to EXACTLY the kind of men you want.
I don't know...there's something about listening to Scot (Mr. "Chick
Whisperer" over there) do an audio program just for us ladies that
kind of made me giggle. LOL!
Anyway, it's right here, and like I said it won't cost you a dime.
Enjoy!
http://www.deservewhatyouwant.net/programs/amywatermanbonus.mp3
By the way, if you want learn more about Amy's cool new course and
get even more cool F-R-E-E stuff (including more audio), please click
below:
http://www.clickwithhim.com/soulmates
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WHY DO DIVORCED WOMEN GET ALL THE GUYS?
Hello Emily,
Hope all is well. I am a 35 year old woman who is pretty, funny, and
has a great career, and great family and friends.
My question is why is it that divorced women are such a HOT commodity
as opposed to single, never married women like myself, when it comes
to dating?
I ask because a friend of mine recently divorced earlier this year,
and men are beating her door down.
All of her recent dates become sexual within the third date (way too
fast for my taste) and the men do not take her to nice restaurants,
but she is getting tons of attention.
On the other hand, she tells me that "no man is going to wait for you
to be ready after a few months of dating, that's why they do not
stick around."
The last man I date expected sex after our fourth date, but we had
only known each other for 3 weeks.
I was not comfortable with that and expressed that I would like to
get to know him better and he said good luck, and never called again.
She recently was taken to a fine dining restaurant by a man who she
has been sleeping with and dating only on weeknights, last Thursday.
He usually just takes her to an out of the way bar but they almost
always have sex. She sees the nice restaurant as a sign that he is
getting more serious about her.
I see it as a ploy to ensure that she keeps giving up the goods.
What should I do? Should I just give in to these men, although I am
uncomfortable with that? Thanks.
Regards,
Michele (Nampa, ID)
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Hello Michele. Thanks for your excellent message--one that I'm sure
lots of women can relate to.
To address your first question, I haven't personally seen a pattern
of never-married women in their mid-30's *necessarily* getting
fewer dates than their divorced counterparts.
While I can see the point that certain divorced guys may find
divorced women easier to relate to, being divorced certainly tends
to involve "politics" (e.g. dealing with exes, child custody battles,
financial hardship, etc.) that a woman such as yourself would be
unfettered by.
Men in your social milieu who have never been married themselves
would no doubt be attracted to that, as would plenty of divorced men
also who are ready for a *break* from drama rather than adding to it.
Now let's talk about the concept of comparing YOUR dating life to
YOUR FRIEND'S dating life.
Ultimately, the type (and QUALITY) of the men you are attracting
will ALWAYS be more important than the circumstances influencing the
QUANTITY of men you are dating.
And apart from your previous marital histories, you simply must
consider the differences between your dating STRATEGY and your
friend's.
You have made it perfectly clear to guys that you are not interested
in casual sexual relationships. That's YOUR DECISION, as your
friend's respective decisions in that regard are HERS.
Yes, there are plenty of men out there who are looking for a fling.
Amazingly, and perhaps ironically, many of those SAME men are ALSO
hoping to meet ONE GREAT WOMAN at some time in the future, but are
settling for quick flings here and there as they "enjoy the ride"
along the way.
Nowadays, many women actually feel the same way.
And that's their prerogative. What's important is that YOUR choices
as far as how you conduct YOUR dating life are reflections of WHAT
YOU WANT.
From there, you should not ever feel compelled to compromise.
Sure, my guess is that if you decided to partake in some casual
sexual excitement of your own, you might have more guys hanging
around...including the one who told you "no thanks" after you stood
your ground after that fourth date.
But even as you feel just a bit envious of your friend because of her
"popularity", bear in mind that she may not be on the road to meeting
a man who will commit to her long-term.
Trips to nice restaurants aren't an accurate indicator of whether
a man is "serious" or not. For example, some guys might spend money
on women because they expect something in return.
On the other hand, when a guy IS serious about a woman he's generally
all about spending time on weekends with her, notwithstanding a
schedule that causes him to work on weekends, etc.
Stand your ground if what you want is a man who will give you the
kind of respect you deserve as a completely attractive woman on the
inside and out, and who is as focused on finding a great long-term
relationship as you are.
Those men REALLY, TRULY are out there...even if they aren't exactly
the same ones who are beating your friend's door down.
My final thought for you is this: Is your friend making MORE of an
EFFORT to meet men than you are? This could be a major factor.
For example, ifshe is online and you are not, then it's no wonder
she's meeting far more men than you.
Online dating is a BONANZA for women. And I'll tell you what, being
exactly 35 is about the perfect age for literally EVERY age group of
guys to be wildly interested in you...younger, older and in-between.
Does that surprise you? If so, it's time to give online dating a
try and see for yourself instead of taking my word for it!
Take heart, Michele. Stick to your guns regarding what you want,
take an active role in meeting EXACTLY the kind of man you want, and
YOU WILL be a very happy woman sooner than you think!
Have Fun,
Emily McKay
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You know what? Writing that answer to Michele really energized me.
Why?
Because I KNOW you can probably relate to at least SOMETHING in her
e-mail.
And the more I think about it, the more I wonder how many women YOU
see around you who are getting TONS of dates...and all the while
their "unknown secret" that they keep to themselves is that they're
meeting all those guys ONLINE.
Are you ready to FINALLY give online dating a try for yourself?
If so, I'm going to do something this week for you that's similar to
what Scot did for the guys in his newsletter yesterday.
This weekend, I'm going to GIVE you a copy of the Women's Version of
Deserve What You Want--including the MP3 audiobook AND the e-book--
when you get my Click With Him program.
If you've been wanting to get Click With Him and FINALLY get your
online dating profile working to perfection, NOW is the time.
Deserve What You Want helps you get rid of the obstacles of the past
and make sure you are on-track to meeting the man of your dreams.
Meanwhile, Click With Him is a complete ensemble for becoming the kind
of GREAT woman who attracts GREAT men...online OR offline.
It's summer and there are adventures to be had with super-great guys
out there. So here's the link to order:
https://secure.plimus.com/jsp/buynow.jsp?contractId=1761906
All the other bonuses are yours also.
And you know what else? I'm going to ALSO give you a F-R-E-E
thirty minute 1-on-1 phone session with me as part of the package.
That way you can ask me all the questions that are unique to your
own situation.
This is something I've never offered before, so I'm going to limit
this to the first TWENTY women who take advantage of my offer.
Our regular coaching fee is $150 per hour session, and Deserve What
You Want sells like hotcakes all the time for $37.
So this really is a very special opportunity that we're celebrating
the beginning of summer with.
Here's that link again. Remember, since REAL 1-on-1 time is involved
here only the FIRST TWENTY women will be able to get in on this:
https://secure.plimus.com/jsp/buynow.jsp?contractId=1761906
Are you new to this newsletter and haven't read up on Click With Him
just yet? No worries...you can do that right here:
http://www.clickwithhim.com/online_dating
I'll talk to you again soon. Have a great weekend!
Have Fun,
Emily McKay
P.S. Would you like to read all about our recent ten-day adventure
driving into the heart of Mexico? Scot is doing a multi-part series
on his blog about it:
http://www.edumckaytion.com/blog
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