[X&Y Emily] Are You Truly Ready To Actually Meet Him?
Published: Sun, 05/18/08
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DESERVE WHAT YOU WANT (WOMEN'S EDITION):
http://www.deservewhatyouwant.com/women
(Audiobook + E-book...both included)
CLICK WITH HIM:
http://www.clickwithhim.com/online_dating
(Be fabulous...and meet Mr. Right)
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IN THIS EDITION: You have an online profile. You even have great
guys writing you. But what happens when it's time to actually MEET
a new guy? Will you be ready?
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X & Y COMMUNICATIONS LIVE EVENTS: Scot and I are thinking about
planning LIVE EVENTS in the near future.
But in order to make them as great as we can for you, we need YOUR
INPUT.
Please drop by the following page, check out the video that Scot and
I made together, and give us your thoughts:
http://www.virtuositylive.com
By the way. We LOVE to travel, so don't be shy telling us where
you'd like us to hold an event. If you happen to haven an organized
a singles club or similar group that you'd love for us to visit,
that's as easy as getting us on the calendar.
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LONG DISTANCE DATING DILEMMA
Hello Emily:
Ok, i messed up BIG TIME.
I met this fabulous man online we had amazing conversations, deep,
philosophical, fun n more. I live on the east coast, he on the
west.
Robert asked to fly to me several times, i said no because i am
overweight and afraid to tell him that. He's an entertainer.
He called me from JFK Airport telling me he loves me and to meet
him (He flew to Italy via NY for vacation) and again i refused to
meet him.
The other strange thing is in the interim of his silence another
man started writing me asking me if i am alone or dating? Turns
out its one of his best friends (steve) - who also asked to meet
me in NY!)
My intuition tells me Robert put steve up to this to find out more
about me. (Which tells me he is still focused on me, yes or no? )
I have fallen in love with this man and trying to get over my
insecurities.
Robert stopped talking to me and not answering my emails (only 3
didn't want to bombard him)
WHAT DO I DO NOW? HOW DO I GET HIM TO BREAK THE SILENCE?
HELP ME NOW PLZZZZZZZZZZZZ
No Name In New York
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Dear No Name In New York:
OK, what I'm about to tell you may possibly include some things you
don't want to hear, but if you're going to be successful at online
dating, I really do hope you'll at least give what I'm about to say
some thought.
If you have put accurate pictures on your profile and have
interacted via webcam with Robert then your insecurity about your
weight is unfounded. If he has a realistic picture of who he's
going to meet, then you should get over your insecurity.
On the other hand, if your profile pictures do not represent the
current version of you then you have essentially been deceitful.
While it's true that many, many more men prefer curvier women than
you'd probably guess, the secret here is to make sure you are
attracting the ones with your profile who would be attracted to you
in real life.
Portraying yourself accurately in an online profile is an absolute
must. Otherwise the entire system breaks down.
Robert is most likely not online to make "pen pals". He's there to
actually meet women. When he offered to fly to meet you several
times and you refused, that honestly should have been his first
clue that you we're concerned about disappointing him.
When he is actually IN New York and hoping to meet you--and you still
refuse--what does he have left to go on? I'm sure he was greatly
disappointed if not utterly frustrated.
So I'm hard pressed to blame him for not communicating with you
further.
Now as far as Steve goes, my first thought is that if he has gone
ahead and told you he's Robert's friend then his contact to you is
with Robert's blessing.
Notwithstanding that, he must not value his friendship with Robert
much. Either that or there's game-playing going on as you suspect.
But ALL of the above is really of little consequence considering the
"big picture".
The heart of the matter is this: Why in the WORLD are you
searching for men in Los Angeles when you life in the largest metro
area in the United States? (!!!)
It really appears that your insecurity about weight is relegating
your online experience to nothing more than e-mail exchanges and
perhaps phone conversations that offer you the temporary
butterflies of having received attention from men.
But without the intent of actually meeting anyone, you are only
kidding yourself by indulging yourself in such vicarious thrills.
Not only are you deceiving men who could mean well, you are now
coming face to face with the fact that the emotions you begin to
feel are very real.
And all you've done is set yourself up for heartbreak. It's as if
you've "painted yourself into a corner" as the saying goes.
My encouragement to you is very simple. Simple, but perhaps not
easy.
Boldly represent yourself as accurately as you can in your profile.
Take brand new pictures of yourself dressed as stylishly as you
can, indoors in a naturally-lit environment.
Be sure to smile your warmest and most confident smile. Think of
yourself as a celebrity posing for your "autograph picture" to be
signed and handed out to your adoring fans.
And then, agree to trust that the men you attract genuinely want to
meet you. And trust yourself to have the courage to meet those men
in person. And please...stick to the New York metro area (or the
Tri-State area, at least).
One more very important step.
If you really do believe that you are not the best version of
yourself to attract a man, make a decision RIGHT NOW to become that
person.
Do not be passive about this, but instead take control of your life,
your health and your future happiness. This is how you begin to
deserve what you want and attract the kind of man you dream of...for
real this time.
Have Fun,
Emily McKay
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Getting e-mails like the one highlighted in today's newsletter
reminds me of how COMPLICATED online dating can get if we allow it
to be.
But I promise you that it doesn't have to be like that.
One of the ways I've made Click With Him extra special for you is
by including TONS of secrets on how to become the absolute ultimate
version of YOU that you can be.
In other words, I show you very practical ways you can really, truly
become the woman who men are attracted to immediately and want to
commit to after getting to know better.
And since I've personally lived through lots of dating frustration
myself, I wrapped it all with PLENTY of encouragement.
Truly, there's nothing I want more than for YOU to experience the
incredible fulfillment of ACTUALLY MEETING a great man,
...and having him be THRILLED that he did so!
If you haven't yet read about Click With Him, now is the time:
http://www.clickwithhim.com/online_dating
In fact, if you've experienced any kind of frustration at all with
online dating I'm ready to help YOU succeed.
And if you just need that extra boost to help you actually try
online dating for the first time? Then you'll be amazed by how
easy I can help make a great online dating experience happen for you.
So here's a 35% OFF coupon with my compliments. Simply enter "xy35off"
in the "Optional Info" field when ordering, and it shall be done.
From there, I'll open the gate to the entire Member's Area for you...
including all TWELVE HOURS of audio and video, plus ALL THE BONUSES.
Here's that link again:
http://www.clickwithhim.com/online_dating
Isn't it time for you to discover the 21st century way to meet
great men?
I'll be writing to you again soon.
Have Fun,
Emily McKay
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