[X&Y Emily] What Are His Motives, ?
Published: Fri, 05/23/08
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DESERVE WHAT YOU WANT (WOMEN'S EDITION):
http://www.deservewhatyouwant.com/women
(Make the right decisions, get what you want)
CLICK WITH HIM:
http://www.clickwithhim.com/online_dating
(Meet a great man, online OR offline)
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IN THIS EDITION: Can a man really fall in love quickly? Or could he
have ulterior motives for saying those "three little words"?
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COULD HE REALLY BE IN LOVE ALREADY?
Hey Emily,
I hope things are going great for you with Scot and your toddler.
I met this guy and I ended up spending three whole days with him
after which he said he loved me.
After the three days I had to move to a different city and it has
been three weeks since we met in person.
We talk regularly on the phone and he says he can't sleep at night
without hearing the sound of my voice.
He seems pretty nice so far.
My question is this - can a guy actually fall for a woman that fast?
I've always heard that men take time to think relationship.
I might go back to this place and the guy says that if I do he will
be with me and only me and no other girl.
It's just so fast and I'm so confused.
Also, should I wait for sex and if I do then, how long? We've
already been a bit physical.
Lastly, I'm a virgin. I'm twenty-three, the guys twenty-five. He
says that men find virgins more appealing than women who sleep
around and that men respect virgins. Is this true?
Any insight on these matters would be greatly appreciated. Have a
great weekend and a great summer!
With warm regards,
Kumari (India)
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Hello Kumari,
Thank you so much for writing me. The family is doing great.
Junior just turned 6 months yesterday. Where does the time go? :-)
You asked some really great questions.
First of all, can a man fall in love quickly?
Sometimes people know what they want and have solid intuition about
and good intentions for the people they meet.
However a man who has trouble with finding a woman to like him
could respond in the same way, couldn't he?
In that scenario, however, he would be acting more on desperation
than "love", doing whatever you want in an attempt to keep you.
For most women, that's a major psychological factor in feeling like
they are "settling".
And let's not some men out there are unscrupulous and will say what
they believe you want to hear in order to bed you. Considering
you're a virgin, you may very well spark the fantasies of guys like
this in exactly the way you'd most want to avoid.
Here is the thing, though, no matter what.
Three days is not enough to really know what kind of man this is.
Besides, real love comes from getting to know someone over a period
of time.
You can indeed have a very good feeling about someone within a
short amount of time, but this really does come from having dated
lots and therefore knowing from experience exactly what you want
from a man.
But the irony is that same level of experience will ALSO tell you
that both men and women should take time to think about getting
into a relationship.
Too many people let themselves fall in love too quickly with
someone who is not a good match for them.
My question to you is, "What is it about him that makes you think
about him?"
You never said that you have feelings for him, which I found
conspicuously absent given the rest of the subject matter of your
message.
Is the fact that he said he loves you ALONE what caught your
interest?
Your virginity should be special to you.
When you decide to lose your virginity it should be based on want
you want, not what a man thinks or said.
And yes, some men will key in on your virginity, considering it a
challenge or even a particularly satisfying sexual conquest to go
after.
So with that said, don't take your virginity lightly in the least.
You're 23 years old, and if you are more comfortable waiting for
the right guy who has through time and action proven to you that he
is committed to you, that's a solid plan.
A respectable man will appreciate that and never pressure you. He
will understand that you want to wait for the right man and time.
By the way, have you considered finding someone closer to where
you live? As we talk about often in this newsletter, it's so much
easier to get to know someone more naturally that way without
letting so much water slip under the bridge.
When I was single, I met several men who believe they loved me and
wanted to marry me. But that was not good enough. I wanted the
right man, a great one who was my match.
You will meet the right man as long as you don't settle for the
first man who says he loves you or wants to marry you.
I wish you the best in life. Have fun out there dating and meeting
some great men who will honor and respect you as you deserve!
Have fun,
Emily McKay
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Decoding a man's behavior and finding out quickly what his true
intentions are is incredibly important?
Even if you are a high-quality woman who deserves a great man, you
STILL have to know how to recognize the kind of man who is right for
you and weed out the wrong ones.
After all, that's HALF of what deserving what you want is all about.
In the Women's Edition of Scot's book Deserve What You Want, he
shows you ALL ABOUT what it takes to know what you DON'T WANT so that
you can make empowered decisions:
http://www.dating-advise.us/women
Getting a guy's perspective on all of this is GOLDEN. And what's
more, now he's got the AUDIO version for you along with the e-book
so you can hear him TELL YOU all of his secrets and really hear the
passion and meaning in his voice.
And of course, you can expect to discover everything you'll need to
know about how to attract a high-quality man, and what exactly to
do to make him TRULY want to stay with YOU and ONLY YOU forever once
you find him.
Right now, I've added some really fun bonuses, too. Read about it
all here:
http://www.dating-advise.us/women
Thanks as always for reading, ladies. Remember I LOVE to hear from
you so keep your e-mails coming!
Have Fun,
Emily
P.S. Remember, we REALLY, REALLY want to hear from you regarding
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Leave us your comments, and win a copy of Click With Him!
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