[X&Y] When You Finally Meet A Great Woman, Don't Make THIS Killer Mistake...

Published: Wed, 06/15/22



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IN THIS EDITION:  How about we completely re-arrange some
established "pickup" advice?  

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TURN THIS SHIP AROUND...


...Once and for all.

2022 is nearly half-over.  Obviously, the world has changed
over the past couple of years in ways nobody expected.

You can stand by and let it all happen TO you.

Or, you can take full ownership over your life and make it
happen FOR you.

What if we as men viewed the current state of affairs as an
OPPORTUNITY instead of a crisis of fear?

How would that change EVERYTHING, including how we interact
with women?

You do NOT have to make this stand alone.  If you have ever,
even for an inkling, considered doing a Ten-Plus coaching
program with me, I challenge you to step up.

We live in a world where women are more fearful than ever...

...and so are the MEN, unfortunately.

Meanwhile, leadership is at a precious premium.

If you look at all of this through a more powerful lens, there
has NEVER been a better time for a "big four" man to identify,
attract and inspire an equally worthy woman.

While the rest of the world seems to run AWAY from
problems, run TOWARD your solution. 

Does this somehow resonate with you?

Even if it sparks curiosity in the form of more questions
than answers, I'm here for you.

Let's talk strategy:



https://mountaintoppodcast.com/coach



Move forward and never look back.




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READER QUESTIONS AND COMMENTS


Hi Scot,

First like to say, really enjoying your products. I don't buy online
without strict circumspection and this has paid off.

I'd been listening to the "pick up" sort of info for months now.

I started with [withheld].  The only thing is that I think he's got
a serious chip on his shoulder about women.

In any case, I arrived at you and find that your perspective is
closer to what I believe, or would like to believe.
 
Anyway I've got a question.

I'm currently "casually" seeing a girl from home. I go to college
in a different place to her so I only really see her at the
weekends.

Although we are not exclusive, since I've been with her I find
that I'm not really interested in any other girls.

There are a few problems with this because I know the wisdom in
not putting my eggs all in one basket.  

I am wondering what to do because I am also finding my confidence
reduced and my insecurity about this situation increased--although
I know enough not to act needy or anything like that, even if I'm
feeling it.

I think from her end, she probably thinks that everything is fine
and it's just fine and casual.

But do you think I should end this relationship if it's causing
internal (and imagined) distress even if I like her and she likes
me?

It's probably not far off "one-itis" (shudder LOL) but the thing
is she likes me too.

If I am to end it I would want to do so in as masculine a way as
possible, if that is possible. How would that even be done?

There can be no reason to end a decidedly good situation except
for me wussing out!  That throws masculine out the window LOL.
 
Anyway, I'd appreciate any advice you'd have.


Cheers,

Gordon  (Cardiff, UK)



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OK, thanks for bringing up a great topic, Gordon.

Here we arrive at an issue I see A LOT based on old, worn out
men's dating advice that has always been suspect. 
 
Such teaching included such pearls of wisdom as "avoid one-itis",
"don't give your power away to women", and/or as you mentioned,
"don't put your eggs in one basket".  
 
All of this is nice entry-level advice if you are a supplicative
wussy-boy who tends to fall in "love" with anyone female who can
fog a mirror, whether she reciprocates your interest or not.
 
The problem arises when we take this kind of teaching in the
overarching, more general sense.

What happens then?  

A guy like you or me meets a woman we like very much--much more
than the others we've dated.  

And she likes us back...a lot.  

So we're under the impression, because of what we've read\
elsewhere that we should BREAK UP WITH HER?
 
This is the part where somebody scratches the needle across the
record while the music's playing...bringing it all to an abrupt
stop with a "WHAAAT?"
 
Since your "main squeeze" lives where home is for you, and you see
her every weekend, I'm hard pressed to call this a long-distance
relationship, so I think you should be GLAD you've found a woman
you can potentially keep around long-term.  

And she apparently likes you back.  THIS IS NOT A BAD THING.  

In fact, this is what most guys DREAM OF.

And besides, whenever I've read about the condition commonly
known as "one-itis" it's usually in the context of a man falling
for a woman from afar--regardless of any real interaction with
her at all, let alone an actual relationship.
 
I mean, going to college and experiencing the feeling that the only
woman you really want is the one YOU HAVE?  That's about as
good as it gets, and ALMOST NO GUYS ever get to have that in
their lives.  
 
Why am I so sure about what I'm saying?  

Well, many years ago I was in your situation almost exactly.  

Instead of manning up, I BROKE UP WITH the girl of my dreams
because my own weakness and jealousy pissed me off.  

Not only did some other guy snag her up literally THE DAY AFTER
we broke up, he married her.  

And last I checked in the "alumni news" section of my alma
mater's newsletter, she was still married to him with three kids.  

That was a great woman...and I screwed up.  

So when I met Emily sixteen years ago, you can bet I didn't make the
same mistake.  

I let all the other women in my life go--BY CHOICE--and have not
looked back.  

After all, I dated enough to know who I wanted.  And when she showed
up, I didn't have room in my schedule anymore for the other women I
had been dating.

This is all about HAVING 100% CONTROL over your dating life and
having the FREEDOM to make the decisions YOU WANT TO MAKE...
when and only when the TIME IS RIGHT by your own standards.
 
Quote:  "There can be no reason to end a decidedly good situation
except for me wussing out!"
 
So thereby you have my support for an answer you've already
provided to your own question.

You don't sound like a man who is weak.  You sound like a man who
is hypersensitive about LOOKING weak.  

Fair enough.  Why not LEAD as a man, then, and go make sure you
deserve what you want from your relationship with this woman and
make it happen?

If it doesn't work out, you at least exercised an option that was
uniquely YOURS.  

And my guess is that you'll be strong enough a relationship manager
to continue making long-term decisions from a position of strength
even if it's within the context of a long-term exclusive relationship.  


 
 




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