[X&Y] Are You Avoiding Important Conversations With Women?

Published: Thu, 03/16/23


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IN THIS EDITION:  Women everywhere complain that we as men are
incredibly hard to communicate with.  Why is that?  And more
importantly, how can we step up where other guys fail?

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"SHE'D BREAK YOU IN HALF"


When I was a kid, we'd vacation in Ocean City, MD every summer.

If you've never been there, "OC" has a pretty much stereotypical
boardwalk.  That is to say it's tons of fun and the place to be
at night, at least if you're under 21.

So true to form, Dad took us all for pizza on the boardwalk one
August night when I was about, oh, twelve or thirteen.

One of the waitresses was a magnificently voluptuous brunette
with long hair, even longer legs and thighs that could crack
walnuts.  She was at least old enough to drink.

Dad couldn't help but notice that I was checking her out.

Without missing a beat, he said, "She'd break you in half."

Indeed.

What's more, I wouldn't even have known what in the world to
do with all of that woman even if I had been given the chance.

Well, here's the thing.  We all know that at some point when we
grow up something's got to change in that department.

You've got to know how to please a woman.

And if you want one who is 100% woman all the time with the
"dangerous curves" to match, you've got to give her every bit
of what she can handle...and then some.

But the tough part is most guys still get broken in half.

The hotter and better she is, the more you're going to have
to step up.

By now you know that I specialize in excellence: as a man,
when meeting and attracting women, and yes, in the bedroom.

Tragically, most men get intimidated by even the thought of
sex with the women who actually turn them on the most.

And many simply give up without even trying, settling for
mediocrity (at best).

But guess what?  It's actually much easier than you think to
be the freaking MAN who rocks a woman's world...even a woman
who's clearly built for good, hard sex.

That's why every man should have a copy of Behind Closed
Doors:



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I've designed Behind Closed Doors to be the complete package
for great sex.

Identify a woman who is good in bed.  BE good in bed for her.

Then, make her gasp in pleasure and amazement like no other man
can...again and again and again.

And for the next 48 hours I'm going to break it in half.
That's right, you'll get it for half-price:



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Plus, I'll give you the add-on program "Beyond Closed Doors"
and th  now-infamous "Steps To Sex" audio for FREE with
purchase.

I'll keep the doors open for 48 hours, but this promo will disappear
after that.



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WHY WE AVOID HAVING IMPORTANT CONVERSATIONS
WITH WOMEN


As I just mentioned above, we as men often psych ourselves out
from the sex we'd really like to have.

But then again, we seem to avoid even talking to women, let alone
getting naked with them.

And I'm not referring solely to approach situations.   

Even after we finally introduce ourselves to a woman, talk to her
on the phone, go on a few dates and even start a relationship with
her we STILL don't have the deep and sometimes necessary
conversations with her that we should.

What's up with that?

It's really no wonder that women harp on how we as guys can be so
"distant", and on how virtually impossible it is to get us to have
a real, honest-to-goodness conversation with them.

If I had to guess, I'd say one reason we tend to be like that is
because women can be such talkers that we know if we engage in
conversation with them, it may go on...and on...and on.

Another valid reason may be that when we do talk at length about
something, it's usually about sports, cars, beer or whatever guy
stuff we want to fill the blanks with.  

Meanwhile, women generally aren't so good at (or interested in)
making conversation about that stuff.

I also suspect that we absolutely dread that a woman is going to
want to talk about our feelings, probably with a LOT of emotion
involved.

By nature, we really just want to unwind and forget about stress
and drama for a while.

Yeah, yeah...I've just spouted several stereotypes at you.  I get
that.  Except that each of those scenarios really is super common.
There's just no denying it.

Yet even if a woman is the exception to the norm in every one of
those ways, the fact remains that we somehow STILL tend to avoid
talking to women about some truly important things.

Even when they REALLY should be brought up.

Even when we allegedly REALLY care about her.

For some reason, we tend to stick our head in the sand like an
ostrich when issues come up, knowing full well they won't go away.

When she does something that's really turning us off--possibly even
killing our attraction for her--maybe we stay silent about it.

If our boss has informed us that we've got to travel to a business
meeting in Detroit on the same day we've made plans to have dinner
with her, perhaps we don't exactly know how to tell her so.

Instead of having the all-important STD talk before the first time
we have sex with her, most of us clam up...lest we "ruin the moment".

And when the time comes that we think it's time to break up, some
of us simply disappear without a trace.  No call, not even a text.

Weirdly, it's not like the issue doesn't eventually come up.  

And when it does, it has usually escalated to a fever pitch by
then.  Yet all we can do at that point is mumble something to the
effect of, "Yeah, well...I was meaning to talk to you about that."

Let's face it.  Women may very well have a point when they vent
their collective frustration about how getting us to communicate is
like pulling teeth.

That frustration comes from their burning desire to have us LEAD,
yet we run away and hide.

Instead of making them feel safe and secure, we leave them with a
bunch of question marks.  When they don't have any idea what we're
thinking, they get uneasy about most everything.

Further, when we lack the boldness to state what's on our mind,
that strikes them as the exact OPPOSITE of confidence.

Add it all up and you can easily conclude that a man of real, solid
character wouldn't act that way.  He'd say what needs to be said,
when it needed to be said.   

He'd do so compassionately, but directly.

Yet, we sacrifice every one of the "big four" traits that make a
high quality woman crazy about us at the altar of avoiding
conversation.

We do so even though we may be fully aware that it's KILLING our
level of success with women.

Why do we do that?  If we can figure that out, we can address the
problem and crush it for good.

Here's what I think.  I firmly believe we as guys avoid talking to
women--especially about difficult or "politically loaded" subject
matter--because of FEAR.

We're wusses.  And what we fear is HER emotional reaction.

Not one of us, as decent, well-meaning men, wants to find himself
responsible for making a woman cry.  And if we do, we most
certainly don't want to be present to see it happen.

Moreover, we really want to avoid getting a woman upset, worried or
traumatized in any way, shape or form.   We know all too well that
those are lose/lose situations.

So when faced with the legitimate need to have a serious
conversation with a woman about something, we weigh the cost of
potentially stirring up so much emotion versus the cost of simply
avoiding the issue.

The latter almost always wins, at least in the moment.

But here's the deal.  

You may remember how I've told you in the past that a shocking
number of guys avoid approaching women on account of fearing
"rejection", even when they've never really put the matter to the
test.  

But in reality, were they to actually TRY approaching a woman,
they'd likely see it's not so "dangerous" and that women are really
friendly.

Well, I believe that approaching a potentially sticky conversation
is similar in many ways.

The truth is that if you're dealing with an emotionally stable
woman (and I trust they're the only ones you'd build a relationship
with) you might discover something amazing were you to actually
open up to her.

That's this:  She can handle the truth.

I can remember when this revelation hit me like a lightning bolt
between the eyes.

One day, back when I started seeing some success at dating multiple
women at once, I realized I had to narrow the field.

Not wanting to wimp out and simply disappear like other guys seem
to, I decided to go ahead tell women straight-up when it was time
for them to find another guy who would appreciate them more than I
ever could.

Essentially, I took them at face value based on how many times I'd
heard them repeat how irked they were when men just vanished on
them without a trace.

I was shocked by the results.  

Although some were disappointed, others were actually perfectly
okay with splitting up.   

Importantly, even over the course of a few years and dozens of
women not one of them went off on me like a bottle-rocket.  For
certain, none of them hated me afterward.  

Some even THANKED me for being honest with them.  Others told me
that I was the most up-front guy they'd ever dated, and told me I
should write a book for other guys on how to be like that
(seriously).

So what's the takeaway?  Only this:  Don't fear the conversation.

Go ahead and throw on the table whatever needs to be discussed, and
watch in awe as women actually find you MORE attractive as a direct
result.


 
 



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