[X&Y] What Do Women Really Think About Sex?

Published: Sat, 10/07/23


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IN THIS EDITION:   You're out on a date with a woman, and you'd
love to find out what her attitudes and feelings about sex are.
Should you come right out and ask, or what?

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SO GOOD I GOT A COPY FOR MYSELF


Okay, I don't usually talk like this but...

Go directly to this page and SKIP EVERYTHING until you get to
all the bullet points with blue check marks about a quarter of the
way down the page:



Click Here And Scroll Down To The Good Part



I have to tell you. Those check marks should be GOLDEN instead
of blue.

You don't even need me to explain to you WHY that's true.

Just read the first several and you'll instinctively realize what your
world will soon be like if you can do this for women in the bedroom.

It'll hit you like a ton of bricks that you are going to be SET FOR
LIFE with completely mind-boggled, intensely satisfied women biting
their lower lips and begging for your attention.

I'd print a few of the check marked bullet points here for you to get
a load of, but it's so raw and NSFW my e-mail service would probably
block the messages.

Let's just say that NO MAN she's ever been with has ever even
THOUGHT about doing ANY of this stuff...

...any and all of which will set her off with that unmistakable (and
deeply satisfying) look of "shock and awe" women get when you're
doing something EXTREMELY right in the bedroom.

(You know you live for those moments, just like I do...right?)

I'll just spell it out for you...

By the time I got to the 5th check mark about the "vacuum" effect
that makes her explode in ecstasy for you, I slapped the desk and
gave in to my curiosity.

I had to have a copy of this mayhem-causing ridiculousness for
myself.  (Well, for Emily, really.)

It just felt like a moral imperative.  How dare she and I miss out
on this now that I know it exists?



She Gasps And Marvels At You In Wide Eyed Shock



This is all-new from one of the most legitimately brilliant
sexperts out there, and I fully admit this guy has figured out
stuff that most of us would never have stumbled upon in
our entire lives.

I think our women deserve it:



We'd ALL Have To Be Crazy To Miss Out On This



(Oh, and after I got my own copy of it, I convinced
Justin to give you guys a special deal on it for
the next few days only.  You can thank me later,
after you realize how drastically well it works!)



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READER QUESTIONS AND COMMENTS


Hey Scot,

I went out for coffee with a girl on Tuesday.  And well we had a
great IM session last night.  We talked about a lot of stuff. I
told her that I am interested meeting again but I am not looking
for a steady girlfriend and that I am seeing other girls.

She was totally on the same page (she's not looking for a steady
girlfriend either... lol).  So far she seems like a potentially
high quality girl.

She has admitted she made some poor choices in the past. She's
responsible and does what she says she is going to do. So I'm
waiting to see how this plays out.

My concern is, before we go on our first date, I want to know what
she thinks about sex. I am not interested in having sex with her on
the first date. I just want to know where she stands.

Would it be better to have that conversation in person, over the
phone, or IMing? Just to clarify, the reason I want to find out is
not so I can bang her as soon as possible but if we are real hot
for each other I want to respect her position if she has decided to
wait.

I would rather have that decision made in a stable mind set as
opposed to a "in the heat of the moment" decision.

Or if we are making out and things start progressing that way
should I just slow it down and suggest we talk about it first? (I
just thought of that now)

Or maybe it could be something we talk about during the date? As
you can tell I'm all over the map here. So any advice would be
greatly appreciated.

Have a good one,

Neal



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Hello Neal:

First, the easy part of the answer.  I think if you brought sex up
out of the blue instead of in context, she'd likely think that you were
trying to see if she's game.

And that would feel to her like you're trying to "get something off
her" like back in seventh grade.  So I wouldn't directly initiate a
conversation like that.

For the first date or two the main point is to see whether or
not the two of you even get along.  That's job one.

Despite what you may have heard elsewhere, a man with
options realizes that going after the "close" on first dates is a
lousy strategy.

The better investment is to spend those first hours together
enjoying each other's company and testing the rapport.

Importantly, even as far as sex is concerned you are using that
time to interpret what sex with her would even be like, and if it's
what you really want--not simply from an attraction perspective but
from a social one also.

For example, is she likely to become emotionally attached quickly?

Is she a "drama queen"?

Ask any guy who has bedded a number of women very quickly in
his day and he'll tell you.  Sometimes the fallout isn't worth the
getoff.

But all of that said, when it comes to getting a read on her attitudes
and beliefs about sex, she'll usually let you know without having to
ask.

Now, importantly, what I'm suggesting here does NOT involve
passivity on your part.

You aren't just sitting there with your hands folded like "Mr. Nice
Guy" waiting for her to someday tell you she's horny out of the
blue.

Rather, you are actively listening for clues as to what she's
thinking or even subjectively suggesting.  These may be verbal
OR non-verbal.

Women are usually fairly wise to how guys operate.  Having been
on a few dates in her time, the woman you've just met knows
that lots of men are pre-wired to be ready for sex early and often
in a relationship.

As such, she has learned to send the right message to the guy
she's with (whatever that message is to her)...quite possibly
without having to come right out and say anything.

So then, apart from the idea of telegraphing that you're perhaps
sex-focused, asking directly for her verbal opinions might actually
be counterproductive in other ways.

When you come right out and ask what a woman's attitudes are
about sex, she MAY tell you that she's very conservative and to
keep your hands off.

But what she's REALLY saying is, "I'm protecting myself from
getting used for sex, so I'm telling you to 'forgetaboutit' as a
test to see if you'll stick around and remain interested in me as
a human being."

And, as a man of high quality, you'll respect her opinion on that
and keep your hands off, probably.

Here's the irony, though.

Once she is fully comfortable with you, and once you've
successfully ignited her femininity as a masculine man, women
tend to change their course very quickly.

In fact, I've seen women talk conservatively about sex at first,
and then offer very clear (or even flat-out overt) "take me"
signals sometime thereafter.  Sometimes on the same date.

Go figure.

Women are human beings who have their own free will and who
can make their own decisions.

And yes, they are to be respected as such.

So, the secret here is to watch her actions versus asking for her
opinions.  That's basically a major "chick whispering" tenet,
there.  One of the cornerstones, actually.

If and when a woman willingly decides to be physical with you,
it's because she wanted to.

It's such an obvious statement, but yet so many guys have been
brainwashed to believe that if a woman has sex with them it's
necessarily because he "manipulated" or "tricked" the poor,
weak-willed little creature into it.

I'm calling B.S. on that.

Not all sex is a result of "manipulation" or "trickery".

In fact, I'd argue that very little of it is.   Ergo, why I harp so
much on why PUA tactics built on such things are to be avoided.

So sure, trickery and manipulation are signs of low character.

But more to the point, it really doesn't work...any more than "hard
sell" tactics at a used-car dealership work on YOU.

So enjoy getting to know her for now.

Understand that she wants to know you will protect her good
reputation even as you take a real interest in her.

That includes not judging her for being a sexual woman once
she is vulnerable to let you catch a glimpse.  Man, is THAT ever
an area where we shoot ourselves in the foot.

And rest-assured, when you've done the right things as a "big
four" man, you can trust her signals that she is ready to get
frisky with you are very real and to be acted on accordingly.  This
is regardless of whatever she says when you first meet her, or soon
thereafter

The only caveats are these.

First, if a woman expresses very strong moral convictions against
sex before marriage, and you subsequently get her so hot that she's
ready to forsake those convictions, you would do well to tap the
brakes for HER conscience's sake.

Remember, women follow your lead, and taking such a stand under
those circumstances would amaze her.

But even if you don't stop the sexual progression, the decision to go
for it with you is still ultimately hers.

Second, some women have such low-self-esteem that they throw
themselves sexually at guys they don't even really want so much.

If she lacks passion or is even flat-out distraught about getting
physical with you, that could be what's going on.

Yes, it's still HER choice if she willingly puts herself in that
compromising position.  But don't cheapen yourself by allowing it
to happen.

Overall, man, the fact you think in such an evolved way about
all of this demonstrates that you aren't going to have any problems.

Relax and have fun.  Women are going to love you.


Be Good,

Scot McKay




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