[X&Y] More On Not Letting Women Take Advantage Of You

Published: Fri, 10/27/23



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MORE ON NOT LETTING WOMEN TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU


Here's a note that a guy named Trevor wrote to me in response to
a newsletter I sent you not long ago.

You'll recall that I talked about how women sometimes ask guys
they're not really so interested in out on dates, just so the guy
can pay her way, etc.



  Hey Scot,

  Something like this happened to me.  I asked a girl out.  At the
  "last minute" she invited 2 friends. 

  At the time, I didn't see anything wrong with it.  (What an idiot.)
  She barely showed any interest in talking to me the whole time.
  I was the one asking questions.  When I would stop asking, she
  would stop talking. 

  Of course at the time, I was a confused wuss.  Obviously, she was
  only interested in me paying. 

  Literally a couple days later, she says she's engaged.  I suspect
  she was already with the guy and only agreed to go out with me to
  "be nice" (UGH).
 
  Anyways, I'm not going to have tunnel vision anymore. 

  In fact, the more I "test" girls to see if they are good enough,
  the more they want to spend time with me, and flirt...and other
  things. 

  They say things like, "What are you doing this weekend?"  "Do
  you have a girlfriend?"


  Trevor (Parts Unknown)




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Rock on, Trevor.   Way to be a chooser instead of a chaser from
now on.

By the way, I agree it's a safe guess that she was already dating
that other guy if she was engaged to him a couple of days later
(assuming she wasn't just using that as a convenient excuse). 

Let's just say that if she really is engaged and still letting other guys
pay her way to things, you're way better off without her than he is with
her


Someone else Facebooked me yesterday and asked me how to
respond if and when we actually do find ourselves in such a situation
where we realize we're being taken advantage of.

Well, to be sure, as long as you have your own car or access to
public transportation,  you have the power to say "enough" at any
given moment and pull the plug.
 
You can tell her you have to go home and rearrange your sock
drawer, after you groom your hairless terrier.

And by the way, score one there for NOT allowing a woman to pick
you up in her car for a date if you expect to be the man in control
of the plan for the evening, right?  Otherwise you're stuck in her
reality...or stranded.

Ultimately, though, how to get out of such a situation is beside
the point.

The key is to know the "warning signs" talked about previously that
a woman is setting you up for a frustrating, expensive evening and
you'll always avoid the problem altogether.

 

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