[X&Y] Why Women Don't Care About Your Looks As Much As You Think They Do

Published: Sat, 05/11/24

Updated: Sat, 05/11/24


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IN THIS EDITION: Apparently some guys
still believe that they're not getting anywhere
with women because they're not good looking
enough. Let's handle that once and for all.

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HOW DID IT GO OUT THERE LAST NIGHT?


Did you meet any women...especially any women you actually
LIKED?

...Or did you even go out at all?

Guys, too many of us are waking up on Saturday mornings
feeling beaten down.

It's as if we work all week at our jobs, only to "clock in"
again on weekends...because it seems like meeting and
attracting women is SO much work.

When will you get your big break?

Listen, man...getting over this painful, crappy mindset is
the whole point of the Invincible program:



Check It Out, Once And For All



You see, women are responding to WHO YOU ARE.

When you're confident, it inspires women's confidence in
YOU.

When you're bold, you aren't afraid to ask for what you
want...and you'll surprise yourself at how often you
GET it.

And when you're dominant, you're not necessarily being
some sort of abusive jerk at all. In fact, as a "big four"
man you're doing EXACTLY what feminine women are
attracted to.

You can represent all of those attractive traits while
still being so charming that women can't resist you.

Are you finally ready to end this frustration?

The answers you want are WAY easier than you think.

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Other men are running with it and never looking back.

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WHY WOMEN DON'T CARE AS MUCH ABOUT YOUR LOOKS
AS YOU THINK THEY DO


Sure, I know what you're saying even as you read the title above.

"OK then, how come women go nuts over all those prettyboy actors?
And why do they openly talk about how physically attractive guys
are when they're hanging out together?"

I'm not going to lie to you.  If a guy looks good to a woman, she'll
notice.  

But remember, women are wired differently than we are.

We tend to focus on a woman's physical beauty, at least at first.

And usually, if we don't find her hot she has little chance with us.

But with women, if you watch closely they'll often notice guys from
afar who you wouldn't necessarily expect them to.  

Meanwhile, when it comes to the guy YOU may have automatically
assumed was your biggest "competition" in a particular social
setting, women just roll their eyes.

Why is this?

Well, for starters, your idea of "masculine" may be different than
a woman's.  If you're thinking in terms of a "man's man", she's
thinking more in terms of what IGNITES her femininity.  

Big difference.

I call it "The Clark Kent Factor".

You know the story with Superman.  His public persona is that of
"mild mannered" Clark Kent.  The tentative, somewhat scattered "Mr.
Nice Guy" who Lois Lane, of course, sees as "just a friend".

He's unsure of himself.  He is usually dependent on others for
guidance and leadership.  He doesn't really have a plan.  And he
speaks in a hushed tone, with a higher pitch than seems appropriate.

Meanwhile, Superman has no such issues.  Lois is overwhelmed with
animal attraction when HE'S around.

And here's the kicker:  It's the SAME GUY.  Therefore, both Clark
Kent and his alter ego Superman have the same level of "natural
giftedness" in the looks department, right?

You could even argue that Superman still rules DESPITE the simple
fact that Clark Kent sports a smart business suit whereas Superman
has the added "liability" of wearing blue and red spandex.

Whatever.

It's WHO SUPERMAN IS that makes him PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE
to Lois Lane.

"Yes Scot, but that's FICTIONAL", you may be saying to yourself.

Granted.  But the example is rooted in pure truth.

For example, Emily and I went on a nice trip to Japan and Korea
about ten years ago.  

While in Seoul, we booked a visit to the infamous DMZ, which has
always fascinated me.

Since the DMZ is the "no mans land" between North and South Korea,
who are, of course, still technically at war with each other, the tour was
actually guided by a U.S. Army MP.

Since I love my job, I tend to find it difficult to leave "work" at
home even when on vacation.

So I watched closely as the MP confidently boarded the bus, flashed
a friendly but decisively competent smile, and proceeded to tell us
very directly what we could expect from the morning and what the
"ground rules" were.

"I'm going to make sure you see everything that's important, but
please remember not to wave or gesture to any North Koreans along
the way.  If you do, I'm going to have to remove you from the tour,
send you back to the bus and deal with the 'situation' after we get
back here to the base.  And believe me, I'd much rather you enjoy
the tour as much as everyone else instead."

He was reasonable and direct, without being a douchebag about it.  
He had done this tour at least a hundred times and it showed.  

Suffice it to say we all paid attention.  And as expected, nobody
created an "international incident".  Nice.

BUT...the guy was approachable enough that everyone chimed in with
questions, which he cheerfully and competently answered.

He respected everyone on the tour, and fully expected to BE
respected in return.  It was a "non issue" for him, and therefore
it was likewise a "non issue" for all of us.

Sooner than later it occurred to me that this guy's appearance was
VERY, VERY average in just about every respect.  

He was of average height and build.  And while his face wouldn't
scare small children, he wasn't going to be gracing the cover of GQ
anytime soon.  

This was no "prettyboy" magazine model.
 
But he was CLEARLY a "big four" man.  You know...confident, masculine
in the way women define it, able to make a woman (and everyone else,
frankly) feel safe and comfortable in his presence, and of solid
character.

One of the great benefits I enjoy while traveling, obviously, is
Emily's company.   

In fact, sharing world travels and the life-long memories that go
along with them is one of many, many reasons why being in a great
long-term relationship is so terrific.

As such, since she was sitting next to me on the bus I asked her,
"So, do you think this guy has any trouble getting a date?"

"Oh goodness no", was her immediate response...after spontaneous
laughter.

Indeed.

To say he was confident would be an understatement.  Yet, his clear
sense of sober judgment about himself (as opposed to arrogance)
combined with a clear ability to put us at ease even in that crazy
place was nothing short of amazing.

He exuded personal power...the very personification of the Invincible
mindset.
 
We were visiting what is unquestionably one of the most politically
tense areas on Earth, yet everyone was laid back about it.

And as far as character goes, there was just something about how he
carried himself that openly demonstrated that passing the necessary
background checks to be in the position he was in must have been no
problem.

I turned to Emily again and said, "OK, now imagine the same guy in
another setting.  More tentative, not quite as confident.  Maybe
more of an approval-seeking 'Mr. Nice Guy'.  There'd be a big
difference in how attractive he is to women, huh?"

"Is that a trick question?" Emily replied...again with a laugh.
 
No kidding.  Were this guy to have been lacking in bold, confident,
dominant masculinity, he'd be "Mr. Normal".  

He wouldn't be leading tours to the border between North and South
Korea, that's for sure.  And he wouldn't be the kind of man women
notice.

But the fact remained.  Perhaps ironically, even while wearing
camouflage this guy stood out from "the crowd".

As a matter of fact, we downloaded an old documentary on North Korea
from Netflix a couple of weeks ago, and guess who they interviewed
when they got to the DMZ?  No kidding...it was the same guy who
guided our tour.  I'm sure that was no coincidence.

So what's the takeaway?

Simply this:  Even if you are average (or even below average) in
the "natural looks" department, it's going to be the "big four" and
the Invincible mindset that TRULY decide whether women NOTICE
you or not.  

Sure, take care of yourself.  Brush your teeth and don't dress like
a slob.

But remember "The Clark Kent Factor" always, and continue to
fine-tune your mindset and your persona until you become your own
version of Superman...albeit n your own "natural habitat", which is
presumably somewhere outside the DMZ.  

And by all means do so without the tights, please.
 

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