=====

IN THIS EDITION: The craziest thing about this "rookie
mistake" I made back in the day is that you might actually
look forward to making it yourself sometime soon. Weird...

=====
 


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=====



THE WEIRDEST ROOKIE MISTAKE I MADE PERSONALLY


Years ago I was a guest on a podcast hosted by a guy who
specializes in helping "newbies" learn pickup.

As the conversation turned to online dating, I was asked to
share my own experiences and give some recommendations.

I mentioned that when a guy gets good at writing women and
screening them, he'll go on quite a few "first meetings",
expecting most if not ALL of them to go reasonably well.

As a direct result, he might end up telling a whole lot of
women that he's interested in seeing them again.

Before he knows it, there might be 15 or 16 women out there
expecting to go out again sometime, and this can actually
happen within the brief span of a couple of weeks.

Not giving much thought at the time to the true weight of my
words, I casually mentioned that I'd personally experienced
that exact scenario.

Now, once the podcast aired the comments on the guy's blog
started to pile up, most of them angrily accusing me of lying,
and that there's NO WAY I could have been "dating 16 women
at once".

To most of the guys who were listening, the thought of having
a high quality problem like that was unfathomable.

Nevertheless, I clearly stated in the podcast how I had
FAILED to manage the situation, and that it was a ROOKIE
MISTAKE for me to allow 16 women to think I'd go out
with them again.

But the audience wasn't hearing that part for some reason.

Even though a guy who's focused on learning pickup may
think collecting women is some sort of holy grail of success,
it's actually NOT any measure of true success at all, particularly
if you're all about bringing high quality women in your life.

As crazy and counter-intuitive as it sounds, men who are
skilled with women know better than to string along too many
at once.

What's up with that?

Simply put, if you or I or any other guy has a dozen or more
women waiting to go out with him, we'd have to go on at
least one date every day for twelve consecutive days in
order to get around to actually seeing each of them once.

That's with no breaks.
 
And don't kid yourself: if you're even remotely interested
in dating high quality women, you'd better see her more
often than once every twelve freaking days if you want
to keep doing so.

Otherwise, she'll get the message FAST that you aren't all
that interested, regardless of what your reality is.

In the real world, when you have that many women
hanging around in your inbox, you'll soon realize you have
favorites.

Out of the double-digit number of women you've agreed to
see again, you're going to actually prefer a subset of them
over the rest.
 
When push comes to shove, you'd rather call one of those
women AGAIN after a few days than any the others.

And you will.

On top of that, once you've got about four or five women in
your "preferred" group, you'll likely find one of them is
always available for you to hang out with.

By now you can see where I'm going with this.  

No man of REAL character who has REAL skill with
women is literally "dating" sixteen women.

That's not because he can't arrange to have 16 women
in his life, but rather because it's a logistical impossibility
to see them all.

Well, at least unless he'd like to have his life completely
dominated by forced dates with certain women when he
would actually rather be with someone else.

And I haven't even mentioned how leaving the "second
tier" of non-preferred women hanging is not exactly an
ethical thing to do, either.

So then, what in the world would cause a guy to get
excited about a newfound ability to "collect" women, at
least for a short while?

It's simple.  It's because he suddenly realized he CAN.

Whenever any of us has gone a long time without really
attracting women, once we start seeing positive results
it's easy to feel like a kid in a candy store.

We'll feel like we want to play "catch up" and date ALL
the women we can as soon as possible.

We'll want a blonde one, a brunette one and a redhead.  

We'll want to hang out with a former gymnast with a
spunky personality one day and a tall, leggy sophisticated
woman the next.

If the "sickness" gets particularly intense, we may actually
still obsess over the one or two women who we can't
seem to get to go out with us...even when lots of other
women we like are waiting by the phone for us to call.

I'm telling you, it can get ridiculous.

But once we inevitably burn out from that kind of
schedule and/or get enough angry messages from
women we've made empty promises to, we'll be done
trifling with the complicated and counter-productive
existence commonly associated with our "collecting"
phase.

Mark my words.

Both our curiosity and our ego will be satisfied, and then
we can finally get on with the business of dating a
reasonable number of women who we really like, all the
while raising the bar as necessary and appropriate.

For most men I've ever met who were good with
women, that number is somewhere between three and
six.  For me it was five.  Some guys with busy careers
only have time for one or two.

And that's a FAR, FAR better way to go.

Yes...you can absolutely, positively date multiple women
while you evaluate what it is you really want from a
long-term relationship.
 
But as always wisdom, maturity and character drive a
"big four" man's thoughts and actions.

Handle your dating life the right way and you'll see
quality prevail over quantity before your very eyes.

=====






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