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IN THIS EDITION:  When bad advice backfires...

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WHAT YOU NEED.  NOTHING MORE, NOTHING LESS.


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WHAT IF YOUR SKILLS WITH WOMEN ARE DETERIORATING?


Hey Scot,
 
Unfortunately it's not going very well.   

I understand what you and Emily have and would give anything I
have to be as happy as you both are.  

But "lost" is the best word to describe me at the moment.
 
At the turn of the new year I lost an excellent woman (I believe
that she was even my perfect match) by using some sleazy pickup
tactics.

It didn't work because it wasn't me and she wanted me, not some
tricks from a guy out in California.  

I have dated many women since then but I feel like I would be
settling with them.  Then I manage to somehow sabotage the
situation and feel like crap.  

I hate feeling like this so I'm not even dating anymore.  

I absolutely hate giving up, but I don't know how much more failure
I can take.  I am a fairly stand up guy and have many of the
qualities you speak of, but this has been a bad year and I'm not
having much luck.  

My optimism is running on E.  Is there anything I can do to turn
this sinking ship around?
 

Thanks,
 
Steve
 


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Hello Steve:

I'm getting letters similar to yours very often nowadays, and part
of the reason I'm printing yours here is I'm sure it will resonate
with a lot of men out there.  

Believe me, I'm very aware that we as guys have very few viable
options when it comes to genuinely improving success with high
quality women.

I'm laser-focused on helping change that, of course. 

Most guys would really just like to get a great girlfriend, but the
vast majority of dating/attraction material out there tends to
assume men are all interested in quantity vs. quality (for lack
of a less euphemistic description).

Nevertheless, they run a search on Google and end up getting
caught up in some sort of dark, pessimistic or even disrespectful
teaching.

So weirdly, the simple truth is that when a pretty normal guy
decides he wants to step up and improve his skills, it's
altogether possible that his congruency and perceived level of
character will actually take a hit when he puts the new info
into practice.  

Ironically, this means his level of actual success with women
will likely drop like a rock.

Sure, most of the advice out there will work to some degree.  But
the disconnect likely occurred in your case because you are indeed
interested in great women, not just anyone who can fog a mirror.  

Seriously, men who are focused on tricks and routines are not the
ones who are attracting the highest echelon of women, as you've
already figured out.  

The very sharpest women are wise to all of that and deserve better.
They deserve a man of character.

You've already recognized you are a stand-up guy (read: "solid man
of character").  

You also know what it means to attract a terrific woman, having done
so before.  Be that man of high character and deserve what you want.  

Part of being that guy is refusing to accept a pattern of failure.  

So in a very real way, a simple decision on your part to not "give
up" may be a big part of what it takes to resume being the kind of
man who attracts the kind of woman you are used to.  

Then you empower yourself to confidently continue becoming an
even better man than ever.

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