=====

WHAT'S INSIDE: Yes, you should
be picky. But shouldn't YOU choose
who you pick, and not someone else?

=====



A LITTLE 4th OF JULY WEEKEND
LISTENING


The The Mountain Top Podcast has
been the definitive show for grown-ass
masculine men of character for over
18 years now.

The number of men listening has
doubled over the past five months or
so. (If you're already on board, THANK
YOU.)

Have you grabbed a listen yet?



The Mountain Top Podcast



More than ever before, we as men are
demanding real, fluff-free answers on
being a better man, living the life we
want and getting the girl.

The Mountain Top Podcast is all
about a "no BS" approach while still
being entertaining...and different.

It's no accident that Jocko Willink's
company Origin has sponsored the show
for over five years now.

No complaining. No victimhood. Just
ANSWERS...all with a laugh or two
thrown in for good measure.

Expect a brief episode on Tuesdays that
delivers original thoughts on women and
masculinity.

On Thursday nights at midnight, you'll
get a full episode featuring a great guest.

We've got a nice, long holiday weekend
ahead. If you haven't listened in a while,
get all caught up. If you're new to the
show, I'm sure you'll love it:



The Mountain Top Podcast



=====



PERFECTLY IMPERFECT


[Ed. Note: With the holiday today, the following is a reprint
of one of my earliest newsletters. It was originally sent on
2/6/2006, exactly five days before I met Emily. Go figure...]


The media in this country has a lot to do with programming us with
pre-packaged ideas about what we are "supposed" to be attracted
to.  

As you know, I believe there are a lot of men and women out there
who are going to great lengths to approach a certain level of
"beauty" that is, for the most part, a constant chasing after the
wind.

Last night I happened upon The Bachelor as I was flipping
channels. The eponymous subject is apparently to decide between
four women, all of whom are completely different.  

What a heart-wrenching challenge for him, according to the plot.  

Well, I looked at the TV and as my eyes started to glaze over
(losing interest) it dawned on me. I was personally feeling
zero attraction for any of the four women he had before him.

Don't get me wrong. It's not anyone's fault this is the case.

Everyone involved with the show is beautiful, "nice", etc.   

I'm just different.  

And this got me to thinking. If I really consider the type of
woman I would be most attracted to, she would never really be the
"Barbie" type, approaching media-driven perfection physically.
Ever.  

Let me spell this out: Put a woman who somehow seems more
like an even match for me next to a human Barbie doll, and I will
be feeling more natural, visceral "energy" for the former than for
the supermodel type.  

So who is this chick?

Some call her "the girl next door". I call her amazing, and I
know exactly why.

It's precisely that she is NOT so perfect that makes her more
attractive to me.  

The imperfections themselves may not be so easily defined. In
fact, I'm hard pressed to come up with a laundry list of them
because it would be different for me than it would be for you.  

But basically, such a woman brings a total package that I can
flat-out appreciate. Maybe the imperfections are exactly those I
can relate to.  

But whatever the case, what makes her potentially imperfect for
others is what makes her who she is in my eyes, and I would never
want to change her to be more perfect.  

In every case, though, she's the type of woman who others will
invariable say "looks cute with me".  We just look like and act
like we belong together.
 
This is a magical thing.  

When I know this is going on, I am proud to be with her and to be
seen with her, even if other guys may not have seen in her what I
see.  

In situations like these when things are firing on all cylinders,
we both understand how what's perfect and what's imperfect work
together to make us get along so well.

It has been said that people often end up together who physically
look alike. If you have ever seen a couple and aren't really sure
if they are brother/sister or on a date, you know exactly what I'm
getting at. I think this is absolutely true.  

I have a friend who is physically very different than I am, and the
women he tends to go nuts over I wouldn't ask out in a million
years.

But see, what I think doesn't matter to him, nor should it.

If he is with someone who he really digs, then that is all that
counts.

And it's particularly interesting how he gravitates towards women
who kind of look like him.  

Unfortunately, many of us want approval from others when it comes
to who we are dating. We want to be with the one who everyone
else finds attractive.  

The irony is, of course, that this is impossible to really measure
for sure, and quickly becomes wasted energy.  

Want a quick test as to whether you are vulnerable to this way of
thinking?  

Here it is: Have you ever found yourself dating someone who many
of your friends think is utterly fantastic, when you yourself have
this nagging feeling that you are not appreciating her as much as
someone else would?  

I certainly have in the past. It's as if I am dating someone
else's woman.  

It's easy to get somewhat confused in these cases because the
feeling on the surface is, "What is wrong with me?  How come I
can't fall for this person?"  

Well, that's a case of being caught up in seeking perfection
rather than imperfect perfection.  

Get it?

Just in case you don't, consider this: The SAME holds true if
you're passing up women who you're genuinely drawn to simply
because you're concerned that they won't be beautiful enough,
impressive enough, etc. for "the masses" (i.e. your social circle).

Nobody is perfect of course, but focusing on someone who is
perfect for me is about as good as it gets. What about you?

=====




(c) X & Y Communications LLC, 2025. All Rights Reserved.


Forward this newsletter to a friend, and help
build this worldwide movement of over 100,000
men reclaiming their masculinity, standing as a
positive role model and deserving the high
quality women we want.

 

Get Coaching For Real Results, Real Fast

The Definitive Facebook Group For Men
 

Check Out The Videos On YouTube And Subscribe

The Mountain Top Podcast...Subscribe And
Leave A Review


This e-mail newsletter is a free service of X & Y Communications.
It is never sent to those who have not asked for it. If you
believe you have been sent this message in error, please use the
link below to remove yourself from our mailing list.