[X&Y] The Difference Between Pickup And Seduction
Published: Sat, 12/06/25
Updated: Sun, 12/07/25
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IN THIS EDITION: What is the difference
between "pickup" and "seduction"? And
more importantly, is that really all there is
to getting better with women?
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THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN PICKUP AND SEDUCTION
Surely, you've read a lot by now on pickup and seduction.
It's looks an awful lot like the terms are treated as virtually
synonymous. Is that the case?
And must everything that classifies as "dating advice" for
men necessarily be classified as one or the other?
I say, "Not a chance", and, um..."Not a chance".
For starters, both "pickup" and "seduction" are universally
referenced when talking about the early stages of relationship
management. But it's there where the terms diverge.
In my mind, "pickup" in particular focuses purely on approaching
and meeting MOTOS (members of the other sex), and perhaps
building attraction, etc.
In no uncertain terms (at least ostensibly), we're talking about
the very beginning stages here.
At some point, "pickup" makes a soft handoff to "seduction",
which inherently refers to inspiring women towards deeper sexual
attraction towards the seducer.
Whether you choose to buy into the Dictionary.com definition
referencing "enticing someone astray from right behavior" or the
other one reading "an act of winning the love or sexual favor of
someone" is your business.
But either way, we're no doubt past "pickup" at this point.
With the semantic differences between "pickup" and "seduction"
down on paper, the logical follow-up question is, "Does this mean
there's a difference between a "pickup artist" and a "seducer"?
Oh, hell yes there is.
Having given this some considerable thought, it's apparent to me
that a "pickup artist" focuses on the GAME of meeting women.
"Pickup" typically involves "openers", "routines", and other terms
and acronyms that would make IT engineers jealous--perhaps not
coincidentally, I might add.
The game of "pickup" itself is about acquiring as many "number
closes", "kiss closes", etc. as one can, and in the shortest amount
of time possible.
As the saying goes, "He who dies with the most toys wins."
A "seducer", on the other hand, is focused on the WOMEN
themselves.
Remember the dog that chased cars and finally caught one? Well,
there's your analogy. Once you "pick up" a woman, you've got to
know what to do next.
That's no longer "pickup", gentlemen. It's the "seducer" who can
drive a woman wild with attraction and...yes...sexual anticipation.
I therefore consider the art of seduction to be a more evolved one
than the art of pickup. Although both are very necessary skills,
if a guy learns some "pickup game" and stops there he's bound
to experience some serious frustration.
After all, great women generally do not like being "picked up".
But they LOVE being "seduced".
Yeah well, women are human beings just like you. They love to
buy what they are shopping for, but can't stand being "sold".
The truth about real, sustained success with women necessitates
drilling down to an even deeper level.
Once you've seduced a woman, you must continue to keep her
attracted.
Are you one of those guys who feels like he's continuously
shoveling coal into the burner trying to backfill all of those
"relationships" that flame out after two or three dates?
If so, what I've shared with you thus far could be why: your
vision isn't deep enough.
Don't beat yourself up over this, though.
After all, as we've already said most of the info out there for us
guys about "how to succeed with the babes" is telling us to dive
into a shallow "kiddie pool" head first.
All of this is precisely why we talk about getting total control
over one's dating life around here.
This means enrapturing women and keeping them enthralled with the
kind of masculine, confident, character-driven greatness that smacks
of utter authenticity and therefore pure staying power.
This means deserving what you want". You've got to give women
something REAL.
But the reward is almost absolute control over when and if second dates
take place...and how long you choose to have someone in your life.
Is this worth it to you?
Actually, you really CAN find the right answers quickly and easily
(like what I told you about in the first part of this newsletter
above), but you WILL have to "think outside the box" to discover
them.
Can you be the man who manages relationships according to his own
decision-making abilities--but always with the positive concern for
women that causes them to love you for your efforts?
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