=====
WHAT'S INSIDE: Women who catch our eye aren't always by themselves. What's a real man to do?
=====
NEW UPDATES: AS IF YOU NEEDED ANY MORE REASONS TO TRY VAMANOS
You guys are in over 100 countries all over the world.
That means that your first language might not be English.
But these newsletters, and everything else in the X & Y Communications universe is indeed in English.
Now, thanks to VAMANOS, you can finally have a conversation with me personally in your native tongue.
Since VAMANOS draws from ONLY X & Y Communications programs, podcasts and newsletters--91 million tokens' worth--that's quite literally the case:
Try VAMANOS For 7 Days...FREE
Right before typing this, I was asking myself questions in Amharic. I have no idea what I was telling myself, but it sure looked cool. Maybe one of you guys in Ethiopia can tell me.
Seriously, though. To me, the best part of VAMANOS is after all these years I can finally be there 24/7/365 for all of you guys at once, which I obviously couldn't do in real life. And now, I can also talk to you in your language.
And for sure, VAMANOS is for English speakers too, of course. Ask it the question you need an answer to right there in the moment with a woman (It now has "dark mode", too), have it help you respond to her text, or strategize your entire dating life with it for hours on a Saturday (like today).
It can handle just about any scenario about women and masculinity that you can throw at it.
Go ahead, give it a try for 7 days FREE. It's only $14.95 per month after that, and I'm sure you'll love it:
Try VAMANOS For 7 Days...FREE
=====
READER QUESTIONS AND COMMENTS
I have a question. I am applying the things I am learning from you every day and I am paying special attention to the podcasts on approaching women and where you meet them.
My obstacle now is I keep seeing women I would like to get to know better at obscure moments like coffee shops, waiting in line, etc.
They seem to be giving me "signals of interest" but how do you go about trying to flirt and get a number when there are two girls present?
With this there are the issues of jealousy or if the other friend will try and hinder your attempts because you approached the other girl.
This happened today at a coffee shop with two girls talking to each other at a table.
We strategically sat at the middle table where all the girls could see us.
I didn't make the attempt to go talk to the one girl that seemed interested because her friend was there, but she did go to the bathroom.
Maybe that was my opening but even then to get a number from someone you just met with just 2 to 3 minutes to do it in is strict.
There is a way to accomplish this? So what I am doing wrong with my mindset?
Thanks again for your time and help, I appreciate it and can say I am making the sincere decision to put myself on the path to deserving what I want.
Nelson -- California
=====
Hey, Nelson. Thanks for writing.
If you see a woman you like who just so happens to be with one or more of her friends, there is absolutely nothing wrong with having a specific interest in her.
Remember first, however, that it's a mistake to pre-approve any woman before actually talking to her and evaluating what she's really like.
Believe me, I've experienced situations similar to the one you shared in which I ended up MORE interested in the woman who I didn't initially expect to like as much.
I know...ironic, right?
So first off, remember not to over-analyze. Follow some basic social conventions, and chances are everything will go well.
First, the smart plan is to boldly get the group's attention, with a confident but personable introduction, perhaps observing how much fun they're having, etc.
As always, be observant in the moments prior to approaching and you're likely to recognize an obvious conversation starter.
Then, follow solid social convention and be sure to engage each woman in the group socially at first rather than initially focusing on one (or some) while ignoring the others.
This demonstrates solid social skill. After all, being rude to people doesn't often win women over.
That said, bear in mind it's only natural (and expected) that you'll end up particularly attracted to one in particular.
Women can handle that. After all, they are grown-ups too.
Besides, think of it this way. How's it going to look if you're trying to get with more than one of them? (Unless that seems to be their own idea, of course.)
However, if in the unlikely event your concern is validated and one or more of the other woman somehow manages to "act up" in either a jealous and/or immature way, that's not really even your problem.
Rest assured that any woman who would put on this display is not demonstrating true friendship toward the woman you are interested in.
With some field experience, you'll soon realize that if you follow the social graces I've recommended, most women are at least somewhat gracious in return when a man clearly shows interest in a certain woman in the group.
You are only going to get blatantly "blocked" when either:
1) She's not single after all, or...
2) ...you are creepy, pushy or otherwise an I/J (Idiot/Jerk).
So be the kind of man who deserves what he wants, and there's very little potential for shame.
If one girl actually does behave like a brat, believe it or not it may help your cause as the one you prefer apologizes upon finding herself in a position of embarrassment.
The more gracious you continue to be under such circumstances, without getting rattled, the better.
But this is all a contingency plan for the unlikely.
Women know better than to be that catty towards their friends in such situations. In fact, they often are happy for one another, interestingly enough.
So in the end, what's the worst that can happen? Nothing is ever as bad as kicking yourself later because you straight-up "failed to deploy" at all.
Be Good,
Scot McKay
X & Y Communications
|
