[X&Y] Top 10 Excuses Guys Make For Failure With Women

Published: Wed, 04/08/20


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IN THIS EDITION:   You wouldn't believe the excuses people
give for their lack of dating success (or maybe you would...)

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EVERYTHING HAS BEEN DISRUPTED...THROUGH NO
FAULT OF YOUR OWN


All of us have been told to "shelter in place".  We're all
practicing social distancing.

Life is different right now.  It feels like a lot is outside of
our direct personal control.

But one thing is for certain.  You'll either be an agent for
PANIC, or an agent for CALM.

And when it comes to widespread freaking out, you'll
either be part of the PROBLEM, or part of the
SOLUTION.

What you have before you is a golden opportunity to
be the freaking man.

And it feels great.

If you're getting into that habit these days, I can
guarantee you're going to be completely stoked about
shaking up what you DO have control of once the dust
clears.

Last month I announced the Un-Settled program for
men who want to uplevel their overall experience of
this life.

You'll recall it was all about purposefully disrupting
everything...all in favor of something better.  More
purposeful.  More fulfilling.  More exciting.

But clearly, with everyone's life having been fully
disrupted already since then, doing more of that on
purpose feels a bit too "meta" right now.

I get that.

So here are three things to keep in mind:

1)  Once the "all clear" signal is given, you'll already
have conquered the fear of change.  You're good.
You'll survive this, and may already feel optimistic that
you'll come out BETTER for it.

2)  Since Un-Settled isn't about COVID-19 but what
comes after it, the easy decision has been made to
start Un-Settled on the first Monday of May rather
than this month.  That's the right thing to do.

3)  So I'm going to give added value to every man
who is on board with Un-Settled.  In addition to all
you can expect from the program itself, I'm
including unlimited e-mail support and laser
coaching to Un-Settled members until May 4th.
Talk to meabout any COVID-19 issue you have, and
let's get your confidence and your mojo in order.



Discover Un-Settled

http://programs.deservewhatyouwant.com/unsettled



Take a look.  I just updated the web site some more,
and there's more fun to be had than ever.

I invite you to get on board for what promises to be
an exhilarating adventure:



Discover Un-Settled

http://programs.deservewhatyouwant.com/unsettled



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TOP 10 EXCUSES PEOPLE MAKE FOR DATING FAILURE


One of the most unfortunate truths in the dating world is a
disproportionately large number of single adults have actually
given up on dating completely. 

Curiously, some such people really have no concrete answer as to
why this is.  Others are readily able to come up with an excuse or
two (or ten).  Either way, it's tragic that so many people
voluntarily choose a life without any chance of meeting a
significant other.

My personal feeling is that just about any one of us walking this
planet could theoretically join the throng of those who have thrown
in the towel on dating.  Each one of us could cite some excuse of
our own and be done with it--after all, nobody's perfect.

Yet there are plenty of people who experience wild success in the
dating world despite their own subset of imperfections.  The secret
is figuring out what negative thoughts are theoretically limiting
us and addressing them effectively. 

While there are an infinite number of reasons people can cite for
dating failure, there's a definite "Top Ten List" of excuses people
tend to cling to for dating failure.  Today we'll consider the
first five:


 
1)    Physical Limitations


While it's always a great idea to be in the best shape one can and
to make some effort with regard to one's appearance, it's shocking
how many people cite a relatively minor physical imperfection and
automatically assume nobody will be interested in dating them. 

Ironically, many of what we see as "limitations" may be "perfect
imperfections" in the eyes of a beholder.


 
2)  Advanced Age
 
It's not uncommon to believe one is too old to date.  Amazingly,
this sentiment can present itself as early as 28 or 30 years of age
for some people. 
 
Meanwhile, a simple look around shows that there are newlyweds of
all ages out there.  Logically, of course, all of these people had
to start dating somewhere...and it probably wasn't years and years
ago.

Interestingly, despite the stereotype of older guys dating younger
women I find that men and women make this excuse in equal numbers.


 
3)  Kids


How many single parents exclude themselves from the dating pool
using their kids as an excuse?  Many claim that they are just
waiting until the kids "leave the nest" before dating again. 

This could mean ten or twenty years from now!  Something tells me
that someone who plays this card will simply utilize a different
excuse after the kids are finally out of the house (maybe the one
above?).  

Other single parents claim that "nobody will accept them and their
kids as a package deal".  Hey, how about all the other single
parents out there?  Would they not relate better to another single
parent?  If you are one also why deny them the chance to meet you?


 
4)  Games


If you've been lied to, cheated on and / or stood up repeatedly
it's easy to call it quits on dating just to make sure it doesn't
happen again.  How about asking key questions of prospective
dates up front instead? 

Find out what others are looking for from a relationship and
encourage honesty.  If you've been stood up some, call out
flakiness in the very conversation in which the first date is
arranged.
 
These options, although very direct, are a lot more comfortable
than spending life alone.


 
5)  Finances


"Women want rich guys and I don't make enough money."  "Dating is
too expensive."  "I can't afford a babysitter".  Yawn.  Whatever
happened to assuming the best from someone else?  Not all women
are gold diggers. 

Likewise, if a single parent is financially strapped enough that
hiring a babysitter is out of the question, it's not uncommon for a
potential suitor to volunteer to cover the cost. 

Although it may be uncomfortable to accept such an offer, consider
that denying it means you are depriving someone of the chance to
date you...which is what he or she clearly prefers or the offer
wouldn't have been extended.  



Already you may be getting the idea that it's easy for just about
anyone to pick an excuse and run with it--and that each one is often
merely a front for remaining in one's "comfort zone".  Indeed,
dating is not for lazy people. 

Leaving that "comfort zone" is prerequisite for conquering fears or
feeling of inadequacy and taking direct control of one's future
happiness. 

Stay tuned for part two of this three part series next time.
 
 
 
 

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