[X&Y] The User's Guide To Valentine's Day
Published: Wed, 02/06/08
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IN THIS EDITION: Today is February 6th, and it's time to
acknowledge that Valentine's Day is upon us. Allow me to surprise
you with a take on the whole thing that you might not expect from me...
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THE USER'S GUIDE TO VALENTINE'S DAY
Yes, I realize the title of this newsletter can be read in at least
two different ways. I'm still cracking up over that, actually.
Chalk that one up to that pet peeve of mine regarding how diamonds
are marketed so heavily anytime there's a holiday around. You
know, I might feel like an insufficient dweeb this Valentine's Day
had I not dropped a two-carat rock on Emily for Groundhog Day over
the weekend.
Not.
But let's backtrack a bit. The de rigueur attitude among stylish
"dating gurus" these days tends to be to blast Valentine's Day and
everything it stands for with every bit of raw firepower the
arsenal can support.
Me? I'm sort of on the fence.
Here's the deal. Valentine's Day can flat-out ROCK, but ONLY if
you are in a steady relationship. And only if that's a HAPPY,
FULFILLING relationship. And ONLY if your significant other isn't,
well, a "user" who packs a smokin' "entitlement-ality".
And ONLY if you are in the particularly hazardous habit of
depending on a calendar to tell you when it's time to stoke things
up with some extra passion and romance.
Generously speaking, for better or worse I'd say the two paragraphs
above work in tandem to cover a grand total of about ten percent of
the population...max.
The rest of us are left with a major crater in our schedule that
has to be filled. Either that, or the opposite--a massive OBSTACLE
that must be overcome.
What do I mean?
Well, obviously, anyone who is dateless on (or around) Valentine's
Day is likely pouring mostly imagined social pressure on him or
(especially) herself. That's obvious.
But even people who are living wildly successful dating lives are
faced with a potentially serious plot complication around February
14th if they are dating several people at the same time.
Ever thought about that one?
It seems inevitable that a LOT of money is going to have to be
spent. Worse, your hierarchy of "favorites" could be exposed to
the cold scrutiny of everyone involved.
We're on record around here as being full supporters of dating more
than one person at once. Life is too short to let serial
exclusivity run it's course one person at a time.
The goal is to deserve what one wants, which involves PRACTICE and
indeed a solid level of experience in evaluating what one wants in
a potential long-term relationship.
But the fact remains that one's priorities will show through (since
we're in the Valentine's spirit) like a red thong under a white
skirt.
So how can this issue be dealt with effectively?
Well, you could tell everyone involved that you're going to "just
say no" to Valentine's Day this year. Hey, it has been done
before.
But I'll tell you straight-up that those who you are dating will ALL
feel de-prioritized by that pronouncement. Somehow, that you would
be bypassing V-day altogether is just hard to believe for most MOTOS.
What you CAN do, however, is set expectations (especially with
people you haven't been dating for very long) that there's no
pressure to spend lots of money.
Hey, if you've got extra ca$h to drop and can pull off doing so
without coming off as a needy approval-seeker, go for it.
But for the rest of us, this simple matter of clear communication
makes much more sense. Most will be relieved by this
notion--especially if they're dating others also. If they throw a
fit, you're dating the wrong people anyway...right?
All of that said, I have to tell you something else though. Good
fortune has smiled upon you.
V-day falls on a Thursday this year.
This means you can theoretically go out Thursday, Friday AND
Saturday (afternoon and evening, even) and still show a number of
those whom you are dating that you've reserved "quality time" with
them in which to celebrate Valentine's Day.
Push it to Sunday and that "number" can be as many as six (or more).
Buy cards. Better yet, be creative. I know one guy who even
bought the pack of valentines the elementary school kids use and
handed them out...classic.
Dating lots of people can be crazy, huh? But such times are to be
enjoyed, not stressed over.
So save the money and focus on enjoying the company of the MOTOS
you've been hanging out with lately.
And what of the other problem?
You know, the "dateless" one.
Well, have I got a solution for you. (What, did you think I was
going to leave you hanging? Not a chance.)
The first order of business is to get outside of your own head,
stop being self-conscious about it and realize that 95% OF THE REST
OF US are gripping about Valentine's Day also.
Guys, women everywhere are absolutely sparking with nervous energy
over whether they'll have a date on Valentine's Day or not (well
unless they've read this newsletter, naturally...LOL).
There is probably no other time of year that women are MORE
APPROACHABLE than RIGHT NOW, at about a week to ten days out from
V-day.
Nowhere is this MORE evident than ONLINE.
When I was at the peak of my online dating action, I was FLOORED by
how women would become MUCH more direct around Valentine's Day.
I'd get more messages from women than usual.
Women who had dropped off the map would suddenly write or call out
of nowhere.
And women I wrote to would not only RESPOND even more often than
usual, they wanted to CUT TO THE CHASE more quickly also.
It wasn't at all uncommon for women to want to bypass e-mail and
lengthy phone conversations. They just wanted to maximize their
chances at meeting a guy and hopefully not sitting home alone on
Valentine's Day.
And mind you, these women were often the PARTICULARLY ATTRACTIVE
ones. The self-imposed pressure, ironically enough, seems to be
EVEN HIGHER the more desirable they are.
I'll tell you what. If that isn't a MASSIVELY VALUABLE enough
secret for you, here's ANOTHER: If you think the week BEFORE V-day
is a bonanza, you haven't seen ANYTHING yet.
The week AFTER Valentine's Day is arguably the most primo
opportunity you are going to get ALL YEAR LONG to get dates with
AMAZING women.
Why?
Well, if they DIDN'T get a date for Valentine's Day, the weight is
immense. They feel left out...like they MISSED out.
Plus, there's no longer any SOCIAL PRESSURE to spend money or go
through the trappings of the holiday.
Seriously, guys. The NEXT TWO WEEKS OF YOUR LIFE are absolutely
MISSION CRITICAL if you have "online dating" written anywhere on
your radar screen.
It's time for YOU to step up and be that very guy women might MISS
OUT ON if they don't meet you between now and the 14th.
I couldn't be more serious about what I'm saying. This is NO JOKE.
By now you know that my program Online Dating Domination is not for
guys who want to wade around in the kiddie pool. Over 90% of all
guys FAIL at online dating--even with more unbelievable women online
nowadays than ever before.
Why do they fail?
Simple. We as men don't ever seem to ask for directions.
Meanwhile, there are very specific steps you can take to rise above
the average frustrated guy online.
And so few guys ever actually get around to ASKING DIRECTIONS that
when those few guys DO learn the ropes, they end up MEETING and GOING
OUT WITH their top choices among women on whatever dating site they
are on.
We're not talking about a "numbers game". This is called ONLINE
DATING DOMINATION.
Right now I am very aware that the clock is ticking away this
opportunity even as we speak.
That's why I'm going to do more than just put OVER NINE HOURS worth
of non-stop, practical info in your hands that you can start using
RIGHT NOW to meet women online THIS WEEK.
I'm going to GET PERSONALLY INVOLVED in making 100% sure you get
ramped up online ASAP. As a reader of this newsletter, get your
hands on Online Dating Domination, listen to it in full, then go
tweak your profile and first-email strategy as directed in the
program.
THEN...send me your username on whichever online dating site you
prefer, and I will send you a FULLY CUSTOMIZED PROFILE ASSESSMENT.
That's right, you'll not only get all the info you need to ascend
to a higher level of online dating success than you thought
possible. I'm going to take PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY for making
sure you're all set for REAL WORLD success.
Here's the link:
http://www.onlinedatingdomination.com/
I've just added some VIDEOS to that page THIS MORNING that will
actually arm you with a sneak peak into the kind of practical steps
you'll find in the program.
What's in the freebie videos alone could revolutionize your level
of success.
But there's PLENTY more where that came from inside the program
itself, where I've even invited world-class experts like Dave M.,
Grant Adams and David Wygant to pile on insight into online dating
over achievement in ways you've never heard them talk before.
Find it all here:
http://www.onlinedatingdomination.com/
Now check it out...I haven't put a firm deadline on what I've offered
you here just yet. But remember I'm actually committing to HANDS
ON personal service to you here.
I'll pull the plug on it when I've got as many profile assessments
coming at me as I can handle effectively. I've got a pretty
healthy work ethic, but that could still be sooner than later.
By the way, if you get in on a free month of Power Sessions with
that (or if you are on Power Sessions already) I'm going to be
sending you a BONUS program that covers Valentine's Day strategy in
more detail.
It's likely to hit your inbox by tomorrow afternoon, and rest
assured I got the RIGHT GUY to co-host this one.
That's all for now.
Be Good (or should I say "Love"),
Scot
P.S. I almost forgot...Chick Whisperer #18 is on the feed as of
yesterday. Frank B. Kermit is my guest and the topic is heavy-duty.
P.P.S. By the way, those of you ladies who read this newsletter
will be pleased to know that Emily is putting the finishing touches
on her advanced series for you. It will major on...drum roll...online
dating and be called, appropriately enough, Click With Him. Stay
tuned.
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