[X&Y] How To Plan A First Date That Will Blow Her Away
Published: Tue, 10/14/08
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IN THIS EDITION: What if you could get inside a woman's head and
know EXACTLY what would blow her away on a first date...without
having to come right out and ask? Well, you can...
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Now, on to a topic that's a change of pace from what we've been
talking about lately...
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HOW TO PLAN A FIRST DATE THAT WILL BLOW HER AWAY
As you know by now, as goes my e-mail box, so goes this newsletter.
And lately, as it turns out, I've been getting an intriguing amount
of e-mail from guys who have begun to succeed at getting women's
numbers.
Others have reported that they're writing e-mails to women online
that are starting to get the desired results.
And, of course, what follows logically from all of that is FIRST
DATES...or "first meetings", as I'd prefer to call them.
Labeling the act of hanging out with a woman for the first time a
"date" tends to turn the event into a real "pressure cooker", so
the first step when planning to meet a woman for the first time is
to keep things casual.
The important thing is to evaluate whether the two of you even get
along--especially if you're meeting someone you've been talking to
online.
But that doesn't stop us as guys from trying to impress a woman on
a first date, does it?
For the record, I remain convinced that "trying to impress a woman"
in it's most baseline form is NOT a good idea. The keyword being
"trying". When a woman senses you are overtly attempting to amaze
her, you've already lost half the battle.
Trying too hard = needy and desperate. That's all there is to it.
But here's the part that gets lost in translation.
You...um...kind of DO want her to be impressed with you, don't you?
Darn skippy.
If she isn't, then you're going nowhere. Fast.
In a sense, it's kind of like being cool. The more effortless it
is, the more likely it is to succeed.
And that's the part that I'm getting asked about a lot lately by
guys who are starting to get the opportunities with women they've
always wanted.
What in the world do you DO on a "first meeting"?
And on top of that, how exactly is a guy supposed to "impress her"
WITHOUT TRYING to "impress her"?
Heretofore, most of what you have read out there has likely either
been about how to be a "natural" (while assuming such on your
part), or rather how to "Frankenstein" a bunch of steps together to
help you REPLICATE being "natural".
Well, here's a novel concept: How about fine-tuning what may
already be a part of your EXISTING SKILLSET or EXISTING PERSONA so
as to be better with women?
In other words, what about considering attraction as a DYNAMIC
SKILLSET that can actually be LEARNED?
Look for a deep dive on that very concept in an all-new major
program next year. But for now, I'm going to give you a "sneak
preview" by way of example.
There are about a thousand ways to improve your chances when
meeting a woman for the first time. Let me be clear about that.
But given the constraints of a weekly newsletter, today I'm going
to introduce to you a particularly powerful one I'll call "Mind
Triggering".
That term probably isn't original to me by any stretch, but it
sounds good and describes what I've got in mind perfectly. So I'm
going with it.
Here's how it goes.
From now on, EVERY TIME you are out and around in your metro area,
start actively observing your surroundings in the CONTEXT of
planning first meetings.
All too often we blindly go from point "A" to point "B" without
really looking around. Even when out socially or in some other
"relaxed" setting, we tend to absorb ourselves in our immediate
surroundings rather than noting at a deeper level what it around
us.
Chalk it up to being over stimulated or too busy as a society, but
I've noticed that there can be the most amazing sunset of all time
unfolding before our collective eyes, and almost nobody around
stops to take notice.
So my bet is almost none of us as guys proactively scan our
landscape for great places to take women. Not just restaurants or
clubs, mind you, but ANYWHERE and EVERYWHERE.
From now on, start doing that.
But that's the easy part, of course. That's a "no brainer".
Here's the mindset that takes that simple exercise to a WHOLE NEW
LEVEL.
Whenever you spot a cool place, consider WHAT KIND of woman would
love it.
And what kind of woman would be AMAZED that you thought to take her
there?
Start thinking like this, and before you know it (perhaps less than
a week, even) you'll have a serious list of potential places to
take women on "first meetings"...and furthermore, you'll know WHY
they're strategic.
Get out a friggin' pen and paper and make a REAL, ACTUAL list if
you need to in order to commit the various options to memory.
Then comes the magical part.
When you get a woman's number or start talking to someone online,
do another obvious but often-overlooked thing and GET HER TALKING.
Ask her questions about what she's into. What her dreams are.
What her favorite things are.
You know, what REALLY EXCITES her.
If you've done the first steps I've shared with you above
effectively, what she tells you will start TRIGGERING certain spots
you've taken note of in your mind.
LISTEN and therefore intuit the best dating venues/activities based
on what you've heard.
THEN...when the time comes to suggest that the two of you hang out
together, your plan will be--as if by magic--EXACTLY what will amaze
her most.
There will be no planting her in your passenger seat and asking her
"what she wants to do". No chest pounding about your cars, boats,
etc. will be necessary (as if...). No drama with regard to "trying
to impress" her whatsoever.
Only you having heard that the greatest trip she ever went on was
to Greece back in college...and therefore taking her to that
hole-in-the-wall Greek restaurant for lunch.
Or, you having heard she was all-state choir in high school...and
therefore hitting the coolest karaoke bar in town.
OR, you having figured out she's a "wellspring of useless
information"...and therefore challenging her to "Buzztime" trivia
where you know they've got it.
And had she been interested in jazz, tango dancing, Brazil, hookah,
etc, you would have known where to take her also.
If she played soccer in high school, craved a perfect Long Island
Iced Tea and/or dug rock climbing; you would have known how to
execute the plan.
Get this right and expect mellifluous and/or downright feline
utterances from her to the effect of, "this night was purrrrfect",
"it's like you read my mind", or my personal yardstick by which all
positive "impressions" are measured: "you're AMAZING."
And once you've got that handled, you can actually relax--once and
for all--and get down to assessing the most important question
surrounding your meeting together: Does SHE impress YOU?
Next time, I'm going to show you how to take this concept to the
NEXT LEVEL, allowing you to literally become a master of your home
town when it comes to being completely prepared when out with a
woman.
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Alright, so now let's talk about one OBVIOUS way to amaze women
when you first meet them. That's to COOK FOR THEM.
Are you thinking there's NO WAY a woman will come to your house and
let you cook for her when she barely knows you (if at all)?
Well, granted, some won't. I'm not going to tell you otherwise.
BUT...I was literally SHOCKED by how many women not only WOULD but
DID back when I was online.
Seriously, I need BOTH HANDS to count how many women I met for the
FIRST TIME when cooking for them. I remember one even brought me a
six-pack of Guinness. Nice.
Now, I don't have to explain to you the inherent advantages of not
having to leave your own home to meet women.
I mean, between online dating and cooking for women, you'd probably
NEVER need to leave your home when it comes to dating...at least
theoretically. Now that's a crazy thought.
The important part here though, recognizing how powerful cooking
for women can be, is to EQUIP YOU to look like a genius in this
area...even if you can't boil water.
If you haven't seen my book Cook For Your Date, it's time you did.
While half the thing is packed with handpicked roadmaps for
preparing exactly what will KNOCK HER SOCKS OFF with as LITTLE
COMPLEXITY as possible, this is no "cookbook".
What I've done is assemble the COMPLETE PLAN for making sure a
romantic evening at YOUR HOME goes flawlessly.
Everything from inviting her, to shopping, to getting your place
ready is covered.
And, of course, you know I'll walk you through every step of how to
make the evening flow without a hitch.
It's over 200 pages, and you can get your very own copy here:
http://www.romantic-dinner.com/landing77
By the way, it's the 14th of the month. That means it's Power
Sessions 2-for-1 time again. Grab Cook For Your Date for about
twenty bucks, and you'll have the chance to score.
The September edition of Power Sessions is on how to be a man of
character who women love. The October edition will be unleashed
tomorrow night at midnight, and it's going to be on how to succeed
with women REGARDLESS OF PERSONALITY TYPE.
Think only extroverted, "life of the party" guys get women? Guess
again.
Grab Cook For Your Date and get BOTH Power Sessions (including
UNLIMITED E-MAIL COACHING), along with a few other choice
bonuses...all right here:
http://www.romantic-dinner.com/landing77
By the way, if you are a VIRTUOSITY member, the next update will be
on cooking for your date. So look forward to that, also. This is
the perfect primer for that.
And I'll talk to you again soon...when we'll take "mind triggers" to
a whole new level.
Be Good,
Scot McKay
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