[X&Y] Pretty Women Out Walking With Gorillas Down My Street
Published: Thu, 01/29/09
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IN THIS EDITION: It's one of the most destructive mindsets a man
can possibly have when it comes to success with women.
Yet even some dating experts write about it as if it's a "given",
perhaps even good advice.
Find out what it is...and how to crush it.
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CHICK WHISPERING
The new book that I told you about way back in September is almost
ready for worldwide launch. Inspired by The Chick Whisperer
podcast, Chick Whispering is the definitive guide to understanding
women.
Rather than a mechanical list of "bullet points", expect real-world
descriptions and scenarios designed to take the mystery away and
reveal what REALLY goes on in a woman's mind.
If you've ever truly wanted to GET women, Chick Whispering is
designed to give you the information you need all in ONE PLACE.
Official release is still several weeks away. But at the end of
today's newsletter, I'm going to show you how to get your hands on
it RIGHT NOW...
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LOGO DESIGN CONTEST
OK, it's time to upgrade the graphics. And it has come to my
attention that some of you have SERIOUS SKILLS in this department.
So I'm running a contest. I want YOU to design the new graphics
that will brand X & Y Communications going forward.
Why am I doing this?
Well, first of all, I'm too lazy to sort through a bunch of bids on
eLance.
But more importantly, I really think BETTER IDEAS and BETTER
DESIGNS will come from YOU. You know what we do around here, and
therefore you're more in touch with things.
Here goes:
1) New Chick Whisperer Logo. Must be square, colorful and
easy to read at small resolution.
2) New X & Y On The Fly Logo. Same specs as above
3) New X & Y Communications Logo. Must be circular in shape,
and accurately capture the attitude.
Winners in each category will receive their choice of Virtuosity,
The Leading Man or a 1-on-1 phone consultation of at least an hour
in length.
The "Best Of Show" Grand Prize winner will get ALL OF THE ABOVE.
In addition, all winners will get hyperlinked credit on our main
web site, along with credit within the RSS feed descriptions in the
case of the logos.
Obviously, these logos will prominently featured all over the
place, so this is a nice one for a graphic artist's portfolio.
Emily and I will be the sole judges, although I reserve the right
to get opinions from Twitter.
Enter as many times as you'd like. I am planning to select winners
by February 10th.
Please email entries to scot@deservewhatyouwant.com, and feel free
to ask any questions you may have.
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PRETTY WOMEN OUT WALKING WITH GORILLAS DOWN MY STREET
"Pretty women out walking with gorillas down my street
From my window I'm staring while my coffee grows cold
Look over there! (Where?)
There's a lady that I used to know
She's married now, or engaged, or something, so I am told
Is she really going out with him?
Is she really gonna take him home tonight?
Is she really going out with him?
'Cause if my eyes don't deceive me,
There's something going wrong around here"
--Joe Jackson ("Is She Really Going Out With Him", Look Sharp, 1978)
A few months ago I wrote to you about how we as guys have a
tendency to believe women think like we do when it comes to
attraction.
Or more specifically, I guess you could say we tend to think women
PROCESS attraction similarly to how we do.
For example, since we evaluate women as potential sexual partners
based largely on physical appearance (at least initially), we
assume women do also.
Hence Joe Jackson's little "dilemma" above.
But the reality is what it is: Women really, truly don't want a
guy who is "prettier" than they are. They want something else.
And it's not what YOU want, necessarily.
Similarly, it's often not even what you WANT them to want, either.
So sometimes, women end up with guys who just don't "compute"
according to our way of thinking.
And that manner of assuming the entire world, be its inhabitants
male or female really, thinks exactly like we do is a real killer.
Not only is it obviously arrogant to see things that way, it's
flat-out shortsighted. It's just not the case.
I've described before how this phenomenon weaves it's way into our
psyche and keeps us from success with women*, but I'm still getting
TONS of e-mails from guys who are still wrestling with the concept
pretty hard.
You can argue reality, or you can get in step with it.
So it's time to face it: We just cannot hamfist a woman's feelings
of attraction or otherwise. The floor is littered with the smashed
dreams of guys who argue reality according to women.
Meanwhile, the women we desire can be out with the same guys we
shake our heads at--and utterly thrilled with them.
In order to get a completely different perspective on all of this,
today I'm going to give you the benefit of seeing what happens when
a WOMAN thinks in this way. What does it look like when SHE
considers men to process attraction the way she does?
This may finally clarify how all of this works.
To that end, let me share with you something that happened earlier
this morning.
I got a call on Skype from a woman in Ireland who has just recently
met a guy, and had a few questions.
They met, had what appeared to be a decent first date, and he has
asked her out again.
But...he has asked her a question via email since that has troubled
her immensely. Offhandedly, he asked her what her interests and
hobbies were.
Now the woman is very concerned, because she doesn't have
"exciting, action-packed" hobbies. Further, she's worried that her
ambitions and life-plan aren't going to be enough to impress this
new guy.
In short, she's assuming that we as guys think like she does.
You see, women are wildly attracted to men with ambition,
motivation and passion...typically manifested in a PLAN that makes a
woman feel safe and secure, and which she can willingly hitch her
wagon to.
So when the guy (who was probably just making small talk) asked the
question he did, she automatically assumed HE was looking for the
same answers SHE would be looking for.
But really, my guess was that he would be perfectly happy with
sharing his exciting world with her, and welcoming her to some new
and cool pastimes.
Ultimately, as I shared with her, her new friend was likely most
interested in knowing that she was up for some exciting adventures
along the way as opposed being reticent to join in the fun.
It was a huge burden off of her shoulders to know she didn't have
to PROVIDE THE PLAN, or BE the source of those exciting adventures.
You may be rolling your eyes at this point.
Seriously, when was the last time YOU needed a woman to be a
world-class skydiver or have a plan for world domination in her
back pocket?
The answer is probably "never". In fact, we as guys usually would
rather not have to deal with such "intimidating" factors.
We want to lead. We want women to approve of our plan and jump on
the bandwagon with us.
And in the case of the woman I talked to this morning, the guy had
ALREADY asked her out on a second date. She had succeeded at
creating attraction.
For her, it's now time to go with the flow instead of (*ahem*)
PRE-DISQUALIFYING herself based on...wait for it...her own assumptions
that men process attraction the way she does.
Otherwise, she's talking herself out of success with men in a
similar way we as guys talk ourselves out of success with women.
So yes. All of us--men and women alike--appear to be going around
assuming that MOTOS (Members Of The Opposite Sex) are attracted to
what they're attracted to.
Yet, at the same time men AND women also tend to consider the
opposite gender "enigmatic", pronouncing the possibility of
understanding members thereof "impossible".
So which is it? Do they think like we do, or are they "impossible"
to figure out?
It can't be both...unless, of course, we haven't even figured
OURSELVES out yet.
And let's face it. You've GOT to know what you want in a woman.
You've got to put aside the obstacles of the past, recognize what
your desires are and then deserve what you want.
Right now, you may be reading this newsletter and realizing that I
talk about things VERY differently than some other dating experts
out there.
In fact, in the last three audio interviews I've done, the
interviewer ended up saying the EXACT same thing in almost the same
exact words. "You know McKay, you talk about this stuff in a way
that nobody else really does...yet you make more sense."
Well, we aim to please around here.
Really, the issue is that understanding women and attracting them
does not involve a bunch of high-tech mumbo-jumbo.
It's simply a matter of finding out what women want from a great man,
and REPRESENTING that to them. (e.g. through the "Big Four")
The result? Great women in YOUR life.
I told you I had a way for you to get your hands on the new book,
Chick Whispering. In that book, I show you exactly how to understand
women--by way of real-world scenarios like what you've read in this
newsletter.
So what I'm going to do for you is something I've NEVER done before.
Between now and midnight on February 1st, Central Standard Time,
I'm going to make Chick Whispering a part of the Red Package.
The Red Package is, of course, ALL FOUR books: Deserve What You
Want, Cook For Your Date, How To Manage Your Wildly Successful
Dating Life, and Never Ever Settle.
Right now, make it FIVE. Chick Whispering is yours also as part of
the package...but only for the rest of January, which is slipping
away. Here's where to get it:
https://www.plimus.com/jsp/buynow.jsp?contractId=1805390
Deserve What You Want is where it all started--the foundation.
There's even an audio version INCLUDED...all eight hours worth.
Never, Ever Settle, the follow-up to Deserve What You Want is
usually only included with Virtuosity.
How To Manage Your Wildly Successful Dating Life is all about going
from "good" to "great" once you START seeing real success with women.
And Cook For Your Date? Well, that's the "nuclear weapon" when it
comes to creating attraction. Enough said.
So it makes perfect sense that I would sweeten the entire deal with
a fresh copy of Chick Whispering. Once that piece of the puzzle is
added, you're pretty much on the road to being unstoppable.
Most guys don't pull the trigger on chances like this to make a
real difference in their success with women. So I want you to be
one of the few and the proud. Here's the link again:
https://www.plimus.com/jsp/buynow.jsp?contractId=1805390
And just for good measure, I'm still including ELEVEN BONUSES along
with the BONUS addition of Chick Whispering. That makes TWELVE
bonuses between now and midnight on February 1st.
One of those bonuses, which I highly recommend, is a month of Power
Sessions. And the January edition JUST SO HAPPENS to be on
ambition, motivation and passion that attracts, conveniently
enough.
The feedback on that audio program has been fantastic, and I don't
want you to miss out.
So there you have it. There will likely be a new package with all
five books in it once Chick Whispering is released, and naturally
it will cost more.
Here's your chance to snap everything up for a discount of almost
50% compared to ordering separately. Nice.
Next time, we'll talk about a very practical step that EVERY MAN
must take before dating women seriously. This is MISSION CRITICAL
stuff, and I'm looking forward to sharing it with you. Until then...
Be Good,
Scot McKay
*see http://searchwarp.com/swa398972.htm
P.S. There's a BRAND NEW X & Y On The Fly out as of yesterday
morning. It's called "Movie Moments" and it's kind of different
from what you're used to from Emily and I. Find it on iTunes or at:
http://feeds.feedburner.com/xyonthefly
P.P.S. A big THANK YOU to everyone who is hanging out with us on
Twitter. We're now at over ELEVEN THOUSAND friends. Killer.
If you're not there, you're missing out. Pure and simple.
http://www.twitter.com/scotmckay
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