[X&Y] Handling Tricky Questions From Women, Version 2.0
Published: Sun, 04/05/09
=====
IN THIS EDITION: How should be answer questions from women...
especially the awkward ones?
Let's put it this way--we can do WAY BETTER in these situations than
we may have been taught elsewhere.
=====
SEXUAL ATTRACTION MASTERY JUST BECAME EVEN EASIER
Two weeks ago I told you about Rion Williams' amazing new Sexual
Attraction Mastery program, and a good number of you were all about
snapping it up.
Well, the more I've gotten familiar with Rion's program the more I
find myself really liking it. This is some POWERFUL stuff, for
sure...and EVERY GUY should have access to it.
So in order to make it EVEN EASIER for you to get your hands on it,
I got Rion to offer a special SEVEN DOLLAR TRIAL.
If you know how mission-critical it is to create INSTANT sexual
attraction in women, then you probably ALREADY KNOW that this could
be the BEST seven bucks you've ever spent. Seriously.
So take a good look at this, because this seven dollar trial is
EXCLUSIVELY for readers of this newsletter...and it's NOT coming back
after it expires in a couple of days:
www.sexualattractionmastery.com/deserving.htm
By the way, the seven dollar trial is FOR REAL. You can call off
the "trial period" any time you want before thirty days is up
without obligation.
Rion's a stand-up guy and he's 100% good for his guarantee, which
he makes because he's all but certain you're going to agree that
Sexual Attraction Mastery delivers as promised...if not WAY beyond.
Besides, you know by now that I'm only a mouse click or a "send"
key away. So you know where to find me, and I most certainly know
where to find Rion!
So I'm telling you guys, as far as this SEVEN DOLLAR TRIAL goes, my
highest recommendation is to GETCHASUM:
www.sexualattractionmastery.com/deserving.htm
And by all means, drop me a note and tell me what you think of
Rion's program after you score your copy...
Now, let's clear the desk of a MAJOR issue that is burning a hole
in guys dating lives everywhere...
=====
ANSWERING WOMEN'S QUESTIONS -- THE ADVANCED STRATEGY
It went on for probably THOUSANDS of years.
A man would meet a woman. The woman would ask simple questions.
The man would answer.
Then the woman would follow up with the STICKIER questions.
At that point, the man would get the "deer in the headlights look".
Pwned.
Then, along came David D. et al who offered a disarmingly elegant
solution: Never give a woman a straight answer.
And as crazy as it sounded, the truth was that such a strategy
often worked...AMAZINGLY well.
For starters, it kept first and second dates from degenerating into
"job interviews".
And let me tell you, as much as you and I know how much those kind
of "dates" S-U-C-K (capital letters intentional), I've met TWO MORE
"lady gurus" within the last TWO WEEKS alone who actually go around
TEACHING women to ask a bunch of hardball questions on first dates.
As if that's how women endear themselves to us. Nice advice, huh?
So yes...women will come at you with zingers like, "How many women
have you slept with?" WAY, WAY sooner than you might think.
And to give a straight answer in such situations may be
DEVASTATING, especially to questions involving sexual experience.
Heck, there may BE NO "right" answer to some of these. No matter
WHAT you tell her she's not going to want to hear it.
So why does she ask? Believe me, I'd like to know also.
But that in and of itself is probably the WRONG direction to go
with her too, if you get right down to it.
Neither is, "You first", by the way. She just might answer. Then
what?
So the prevailing recommendation remains to inject humor into the
scenario and give her a preposterously funny and unreasonable
pseudo-answer:
Her: "How many women have you slept with?"
Him: "Oh, let me see... Nine thousand, four hundred--no wait, TEN
thousand SIX hundred and one. Make that two." [followed by three
seconds of a straight face, then a wry smile punctuated with
laughter and shaking your head]
Or how about this gem?
Her: "When was the last time you had sex?"
Him: [looks at watch] "Two hours and thirty...[pause]...seven minutes
ago"
Guys, there's no doubt about it. If you ARE NOT about lying to
women, then you've got to BE 100% ABOUT knowing how to change the
subject when women ask questions on dates that they DO NOT want to
hear the answer to.
You DO NOT owe a stranger your life story up front.
And if she's fishing for all the negatives before giving herself any
opportunity to find out the positives, then that may be all you need
to know about her.
Here's a secret: A mature, high quality woman is not going to
press you into divulging information she knows she doesn't want to
hear.
A man and a woman on a date should first figure out if they even
LIKE each other's company before drilling down to the depths of the
netherworld of sexual pasts and so forth.
Now if you're hiding the fact that you still live with your parents
...or that you've done ten years of hard time ...or that you're STILL
MARRIED, I can't help you.
You're on your own there. She's probably going to need to know
those things sometime before things get too serious. Sorry, man.
But here's the part that I think is particularly crazy.
It has occurred to me that A LOT of guys take this whole bit about
"not giving women straight answers" a bit too far.
They apply the strategy to ANY and EVERY question a woman asks, not
just the ones for which there is no good answer.
Look, I completely get that if you let her manhandle the
conversation with a bunch of Q & A, you're handing over your
masculine power and WILL NOT be respected as a man who can lead.
But even so, I'd say you'd better have a bit more depth to your
portfolio of situational wisdom than simply "avoiding direct
answers".
Here's a pair of examples to illustrate what I mean:
Her: "So, what do you do for a living?"
Him: "Oh, I'm a 'diesel fitter'."
Her: "Really? What's that?"
Him: "I inspect the panty hose at the department store and say,
'diesel fitter'."
Her: "Seriously. What's your real job?"
Him: "I work at Six Flags directing traffic. At the bumper cars."
Similarly:
Her: "So, do you have a girlfriend?"
Him: "Girlfriend? I'm way past that. I'm married."
Her: "Seriously?"
Him: "Actually, I've got FIVE WIVES. I like watching them fight
over me. Fun stuff."
Unfortunately, I've received emails recounting situations VERY
SIMILAR to each of the two above within the past week or so.
An in the real world, but guys DID NOT get a second date. In fact,
the women pretty much DISAPPEARED off the face of the Earth after
the first date.
FAIL. And why?
Well, simply put, when you DON'T GIVE A STRAIGHT ANSWER when a
straight answer is ABSOLUTELY CALLED FOR, you leave the woman with
no choice other than to ASSUME THE WORST.
Now granted, when you change the subject and/or refuse to give an
answer to the sexually incriminating questions, she'll probably
assume the worst also.
But at least she may have the presence of mind to realize you were
in fact kind enough to spare her the conversation...for now, at least.
When it comes down to appearing JOBLESS or MARRIED though, you'll
generally find women are WAY LESS forgiving.
The sad part here?
In the "real world" versions of the examples I just gave, the first
guy had a GREAT job, and the second wasn't even SEEING any other
women besides the one he was with.
So they retained their "power"...I guess...but they LOST the woman.
And the tragic part is that the REAL POWER was really present in
the CORRECT ANSWERS, weren't they?
Being a great guy with a good job is PREFERABLE to being jobless,
isn't it?
And being ELIGIBLE is WAY SUPERIOR in the eyes of a quality woman
to being a CHEATER...isn't it?
Think about it...why fail to leverage all that POWER in favor of
withholding straight answers?
Why think "defense" while your "offense" is riding the bench?
Silly when you think about it, isn't it?
What then is the practical solution, here?
How do we keep control of the conversation, but make sure the
POSITIVE FACTS about ourselves are clearly articulated?
This is where you've simply got to "think out of the box".
That means looking at the "gray area". It doesn't have to be
"black and white".
What you do is give her the FUNNY, ENTERTAINING answer FIRST, let
her respond, THEN share the real answer.
Example:
Her: "What do you do for a living?"
Him: "Well, I used to transport illegal aliens from Guatemala via
18-wheeler, but it stopped being so lucrative after I forgot to
leave the air vent open that one time."
Her: [speechless...slackjawed...finally laughing out loud] "Yes,
well I can imagine you've probably been bogged down in legal stuff
since that fateful moment, huh? [giggles]
Him: "Yeah, pretty rough going. So I've had to go back to being
a regional marketing manager for XYZ company to pay the bills."
Her: "Oh, okay...I see." [still laughing]
Him: "But I sure do miss the open road..."
You can see how in this situation you keep control of the flow of
the conversation while being utterly entertaining.
All the while, you are sending a subtle message that interview
questions on first dates are a silly idea. Do you see how that is
sub-communicated?
Meanwhile, and perhaps MORE IMPORTANTLY, you've CLEARLY
DEMONSTRATED that you're going to be able to field whatever she
hits your way like you're friggin' Brooks Robinson (or at least Cal
Ripkin, Jr.).
And THAT, my good man, leads to FEWER HARD QUESTIONS.
After all, you will have demonstrated an ability to INSPIRE HER
CONFIDENCE, all in concert with MASCULINE CONFIDENCE.
But what about actually keeping your "powder dry" enough to have
SOLID ANSWERS to women's questions...even the SEXUAL ones?
Well, that's called CHARACTER.
Get all of that down, and you'll have hammered home the kind of
"Big Four" guy you are.
Sound complicated?
It doesn't have to be. In fact, you were BORN to be the guy who
gets all of this stuff right.
And that's what The Master Plan is going to be ALL ABOUT helping
you RECLAIM your BIRTHRIGHT to.
Welcome to why I'm STILL adding MORE and MORE to it. When it's
ready, you'll be the first to know...and you'll be down with a
discount.
So for now, have fun, entertain her and keep her on her toes.
But please don't ever withhold "straight answers" with a death grip
just for the sake of doing so. As we've just seen, that's one of
the DEADLIEST tactical errors you can make on a first date.
Have a great Sunday, gentlemen. If you have a first date ahead of
you within the next few days or so, keep what I've shared with you
today in mind. You'll be glad you did.
And by all means WRITE ME when this information ends up coming in
handy...because it almost certainly will.
Be Good,
Scot McKay
P.S. Just a quick reminder to you guys that this newsletter is
NOT expressly about "pickup", and is therefore VERY DIFFERENT than
some of the others you may subscribe to.
I've noticed lately that several guys have actually unsubscribed,
saying that they've loved the content but either "got a girlfriend"
or "don't want [their[ girlfriend finding this in [their] inbox".
Let me encourage you guys. Once you have a great woman in your
life, that only means you should likely read most of these
newsletters TWICE.
Sure, we talk about meeting women from time to time, but by far the
majority of our discussions involve going from GOOD to GREAT with
women... a process that is ongoing in any man's life.
And if your new girlfriend is upset by you wanting to become a
better man enough to complain about your e-mails on the subject?
For that I have not the words. Nor do I for why she would be
rifling through your emails anyway...
P.P.S. We've got a new X & Y On The Fly coming soon. Perhaps
appropriately, Emily and I will be covering "first dates" as the
topic. You can bet what we talked about in this newsletter will
come up again!
=====
Questions? Ideas? Comments? Find me on Twitter.com @scotmckay and
jump into the conversation with an @message.
If you like what you read, please feel free to forward the newsletter
to others. Help a brother out.
In fact, did a friend forward YOU this message? To receive this
newsletter on 21st century dating issues from X & Y Communications
on a regular basis, simply go to:
http://www.deservewhatyouwant.com
(www.deservewhatyouwant.com)
...drop your email in the annoying popup window, and download "How
To Deal With Breakups" for free. Or, just send a blank email to
"xandy@aweber.com". Easy stuff.
Discussion Forum:
www.deservewhatyouwant.com/forum
(http://www.deservewhatyouwant.com/forum)
Follow Us On Twitter:
www.deservewhatyouwant.com/twitter
(http://www.twitter.com/scotmckay/)
Friend Us On Facebook
www.deservewhatyouwant.com/facebook
(http://profile.to/scot-mckay/)
Friend Us On MySpace
www.deservewhatyouwant.com/myspace
(http://www.myspace.com/x_and_y)
Pin Yourself On Frappr (with a picture and a comment, por favor):
www.frappr.com/xandy
(http://www.frappr.com/xandy)
X & Y Communications is dedicated to making you the most skilled
participant in the dating world you can be, at whatever stage of
life you are in. It's all about straight talk about the most
creative subjects, somehow encompassing character-based principles
while being neither too shy nor too judgmental to hit the important
things head on. The basic stuff you've heard a million times isn't
rehashed around here. Enjoy!
Please also note that the information in this newsletter is for
entertainment purposes only and is not intended to constitute
professional advice.
(c) X & Y Communications LLC, 2009. All Rights Reserved.
This e-mail newsletter is a free service of X & Y Communications.
It is never sent to those who have not asked for it. If you
believe you have been sent this message in error, please respond
and we will kindly remove you from our mailing list.
Our records indicate that at requested information
by e-mail from our company at:
Date:
IP: