[X&Y] Will You Be Ready When The "Big Deal" Comes Along?
Published: Sun, 03/27/11
X & Y COMMUNICATIONS NEWSLETTER FOR MEN
=====
IN THIS EDITION: Can you keep your wits about you when confronted
with the opportunity to be with the most amazing woman you've evermet?
One of only two things can happen. Either what you've learned about
what truly works in the realm of attracting women will have become
HABIT for you, or you'll lose your composure and revert to your old
desperate ways. Which is it going to be?
=====
THE "SEX ADVICE DIVISION" OF X & Y COMMUNICATIONS
By now you know Alex Allman. We've had him on the TCW podcast and
hosted some terrific teleseminars with him.
And your response every time we've worked with him has been OFF THE
CHARTS.
That's all because Alex is not only a highly effective sex teacher,
his style is very much in line with ours. Simply put, both Alex
and I are "normal guys" who talk in a straightforward,
matter-of-fact style.
But just like Alex doesn't specialize in dating advice, I'm
certainly no "sexpert".
That's why I often joke that Alex is our "sex advice division".
But in all seriousness, what Alex does is shockingly RARE...and
exceedingly valuable.
I mean, let's face it. Almost all information allegedly designed
to improve your sexual skill these days is either boring, technical
(even medical) mumbo-jumbo or really nothing more than thinly
veiled porn.(And as I hope you've noticed, I don't ever recommend EITHER of
those types of programs to you.)
Meanwhile, Alex neither expects you to have a Ph. D in this stuff
nor insults your intelligence.
He just gives you the information and techniques you really care to
find out about, all in a style that you can relate to.
Well, I figured it had been too long since Alex had run a special
for you guys, so I called him up recently and twisted his arm to
come up with something really cool for you.
And let's just say he delivered...BIG TIME.
Right now you can get his foundational book Revolutionary Sex, and
he'll GIVE YOU a second book--How To Initiate Sex Without Ever Being
Rejected--as part of the deal:
Now, as soon as you click that link above you'll know almost
immediately from the "custom graphics" (What's up with that, Alex?)
that this is something that he put together just for you guys.
Revolutionary Sex is the ONE RESOURCE that every guy should have
when it comes to sex advice, because nowhere is there a moreconcise and complete reference guide to literally EVERYTHING a man
should know on the subject.
And it's not going to break the bank.
So when you add it all up, getting Alex's Revolutionary Sex right
now is ALWAYS a great deal, no matter what.But getting it when he's ALSO giving you that amazing SECOND BOOK
on how to actually make sure you can put what he's teaching you to
good use? That's PRICELESS.
Here's that link again:
Alex told me he's only leaving the doors open on this until
midnight PDT on the 30th. So I'd say it's a great idea to act on
this one now while it's fresh in your mind.
=====
ARE YOU READY FOR THE "BIG DEAL" TO COME ALONG?
Once upon a time, back in around 1996, I had just switched careers
from the vida loca of working with gang kids to becoming an IT
sales guy. As I went around to various site walkthroughs and bid openings, I
had the opportunity to meet most of my local competitors.
To be honest, most of them were pretty good people. Contrary to
conventional wisdom, I even made friends with some of them and had
a beer or two with them from time to time. After all, these were
the kind of people I had plenty in common with. Rarely did we talk
"business" per se, but it was fun to shoot the breeze about the
latest technology, etc.Most of my friends had read the same books on how to be a good
sales professional as I did. Because of that, and in part because
of the nature of the business we were in, we all seemed to know
that our customers were intimidated by this newfangled "Internet"
stuff, so gaining their trust was all-important.
What's more, we all knew--as if instinctively--that our customers
were really excited about what the Internet and digital
communications meant to their business. As such, our job was not
to force the issue but rather to simply help them get what they
needed.
As you can guess, I had some worthy competition for sure.
And we'd all go around our metro area winning a few deals and
losing a few...usually to the tune of about $10-$25K a shot.
Then one day, something ridiculous happened.
One of the largest school districts in the area announced that they
were doing a MAJOR infrastructure upgrade.
Their entire telecommunications system would be replaced, and a
state-of-the-art computer network system would be implemented
featuring cutting-edge video for "distance learning". (Remember,
this was 1996.)
At the pre-bid conference, the twenty or thirty competitors in
attendance quickly realized that this deal was different.
It was going to be worth over a million dollars.
Over the course of the next few weeks while the bid was out,
something wild happened.
Those same "friends" of mine didn't want to go get a beer anymore.
Instead, I was getting third-hand information from the prospective
customer that my company's business practices had been scurrilously
run through the wringer by our competitors during meetings with
them, sometimes along with my personal integrity.
Concurrently, stories of "special favors" having been granted to
the school district's superintendent, sets of golf clubs
mysteriously appearing on the doorsteps of board members and even
rumors of "under the table" deals had surfaced.
As some competitors were weeded out through the process, claims of
certain other systems' capabilities were being openly exaggerated--
preying on the customer's lack of technical expertise as a public
entity seeking to implement very new technology.
But here's the crazy thing: I knew most of my competitors. And
EVERY SINGLE COMPETITOR for this deal KNEW what worked already in
the sales world. And what WORKED was the OPPOSITE of what was
going on here.
If you represent yourself and the product with integrity, the
customer WANTS to buy. And if you take care of them, they'll buy
again and again. What's more, when it comes to high ticket sales,
the "used car guy" approach flat-out fails...every single time.
Furthermore, "badmouthing" the competition and bribing people are
likewise major no-nos.
But putting a seven-figure price tag on this particular deal had
changed things.
Suddenly, even seasoned professionals were back to square one...
acting like hungry "newbies" whose next pack of ramen noodles
depended upon "closing".
Admittedly, while in the midst of all this it was hard NOT to see
dollar signs. For just about every salesperson involved, landing
this deal would have meant a MASSIVE commission check--probably
equal to the rest of the entire year's pay combined.
But when the focus regressed to fantasizing about the joy of
winning combined with the fear of loss, most involved with this
million dollar deal saw every bit of sales training they had ever
received go out the window.
They had been going "by the book", but "the book" didn't have a
chapter in it to prepare them for the "big time". As a result, the
stakes involved just flat-out fried everyone's circuits.
SO WHY AM I TELLING YOU THIS?
Success with women can follow a very similar pattern.
When we first decide we want to get better with women, we learn
what we think is going to get us somewhere (read: "anywhere") as
quickly as possible.
Then, we really do start seeing some success. We start attracting
some pretty decent women.
I mean for SOME of us, going from zero to reasonable success simply
involves becoming motivated to overcome "approach anxiety" and
actually get phone numbers from women.
And what do you know? Women REALLY DO give us their phone numbers
pretty often...when we're assertive enough to make it happen.
And once we start attracting some women, we think we've learned
enough to get by. In effect, the mindset is very similar to that
of the salesperson who gains "mastery" over getting his or her
share of the mid-range deals to be had out there.
But here's the BIG QUESTION.
How are YOU going to react when you somehow find yourself face to
face with the greatest woman you've ever imagined...and she's
ATTRACTED?
Are you REALLY going to be able to "fly by instruments" and TRUST
that what you have learned about attracting women is still going to
work?
OR...will everything you've ever learned about attraction and
seduction go out the window as you revert to "trying to impress"
her and "playing it safe" so you won't blow it?
Based on the significant numbers of guys who write to me telling me
that they can attract average women all day long, but never seem to
make it work with the women they are truly most attracted to, my
guess is that this is a MAJOR, MAJOR widespread problem.
Really, what we're talking about here is becoming the type of guy
who is SO CONFIDENT in the truth regarding what attracts women that
he NEVER SECOND GUESSES that truth when the chips are down.
Ultimately, some guys really are "faking it 'til they make it" in
their interactions with women.
They learn some cool stuff, but it never really becomes HABIT. It
never really becomes PART OF WHO THEY ARE.
But here's the thing.
When you know that the masculine, confident man of high-character
who inspires confidence in women REALLY DOES deserve the highest
echelon of women--and when being that guy has become HABIT for you,
then there's no falling back to your old ways.
Instead of needing to re-read the directions and having to ask,
"What do I do next?" every time, you'll authentically be the man
who has truly become attractive to great women.
So when you find yourself face-to-face with the woman you've always
dreamed of, there's no change of plans.
"One-itis" disasters go OUT THE WINDOW when that's the case also,
by the way.
There will be zero deviation between how you handle average women
versus extremely desirable women.
All because you have MADE A HABIT of being attractive.
Said differently, it's no longer about WHAT YOU DO, it's about WHO
YOU ARE.
Attracting the greatest woman you've ever known is NOT a "game".
It's a radical lifestyle change.
Authentic, consistent representation of who you are and what you're
about wins the "big deals" in business, even as competitors fall
apart at the seams.
And the exact same is true when it comes to attracting the woman
who is a "big deal" to you.
Either you have internalized what makes you attractive, or you'll
come undone.
Welcome to why so many of the most desirable women on Earth have an
infinitely harder time finding a great man than even average women.
What about you? Can you meet this challenge? Can you make a HABIT
of attracting women that becomes authentic?
If you can, you'll set yourself apart as a being ready for the "big
deal".
Be Good,
Scot McKay
P.S. When you get right down to it, if you're NOT ready for the
"big deal" to come along you're going to find yourself ALWAYS
"settling" for women who don't truly represent what you want.
And you'll be "settling" from the VERY MOMENT you meet them.
That's not good, of course...and having read today's newsletter you
now know an important way to mitigate against that.
But how can you protect yourself from "settling" over the
LONG-TERM?
In other words, how do you know precisely when the woman who
seemed to have long-term potential at the beginning really
doesn't?
We'll cover that next time...
=====
X & Y Communications is dedicated to making you the most skilled
participant in the dating world you can be, at whatever stage of
life you are in. It's straight talk about the most creative
subjects, somehow encompassing character-based principles while
being neither too shy nor too judgmental to hit the important
things head on. The basic fluff you've heard a million times
isn't rehashed around here.
Enjoy!
Please also note that the information in this newsletter is for
entertainment purposes only and is not intended to constitute
"professional advice". You are responsible for your own decisions
in life (which we hope will include meeting more high quality
women).
Any external links in this e-mail should be understood to be
affiliate links. Purchases made through them help support X & Y
Communications podcasts, this newsletter, and all the other cool
content that you get from us that costs nothing...and keeps the
good stuff coming your way.
(c) X & Y Communications LLC, 2011. All Rights Reserved.
This e-mail newsletter is a free service of X & Y Communications.
It is never sent to those who have not asked for it. If you
believe you have been sent this message in error, please respond
and we will kindly (and promptly) remove you from our mailing list.
"No games" doesn't only apply to dating around here.