[X&Y] Are You "Preventing" Your Own Success With Women?
Published: Tue, 06/07/11
X & Y COMMUNICATIONS NEWSLETTER FOR MEN
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WHAT'S INSIDE: Are you running the "prevent defense" when you're
out with women?=====
LIVING THE DREAM
In case you haven't figured it out yet, I absolutely love what I
do.
In fact, to say I wake up every day excited to go to work is not
just a cliché in my case, it's the honest truth.
Doing what I can to enable you guys to get high quality women in
your lives is what I'm ALL ABOUT...and nothing could be more
interesting to me.
As a nice bonus, I've literally thrown out the alarm clock that
used to sit by my bed. That's pretty sweet.
But the simple fact that I get to spend as much time with those I
love and travel the world pretty much whenever I feel like it just
makes it sweeter.
So the other day, as it turns out, I was hit with an interesting
question: Would I trade jobs with ANYONE on Earth?
The only guy I could come up with was Jeremy Clarkson from the TV
show Top Gear on BBC.
Now THAT'S a great job.
But then again, he's so friggin' perfect for the role (and
completely hilarious) that I wouldn't put an audience of millions
through that sort of casting change, right?
Suffice it to say that I'm about as happy as possible to be doing
what I was born to do.
What about you? Can you say the same?
You know, what you do for "work" doesn't NECESSARILY have to FEEL
like "work". That's just what we've been told to believe has to be
the case.
You probably also know who David DeAngelo is by now. His book
Double Your Dating had a huge impact on me years ago, and now his
latest work (under his real name Eben Pagan) continues to inspire
me.
Basically, Eben helps real, genuine guys like you and me build
independent businesses...all so we can "fire the boss" and start
living the dream.
Right now Eben's come out with a pretty impressive new f-r-e-e
video.
If you want to start and build a profitable business from scratch,
then you'll want to go ahead and opt-in to watch this:
Inside, you'll learn about the 7 most important keys to building a
profitable, successful business from scratch.
If you miss any of these 7 elements, your business will likely
fail--and waste a lot of your time and money.
But If you get all 7 of these things right, then you are much more
likely to succeed--and make money.
It sounds pretty basic and straightforward, right? It is.
Needless to say, Eben has built one highly successful business
after another, and has put all of his very best ideas into this
video.
Watch the video now, and learn what you need to know to build a
profitable business from scratch:
I'm pretty sure you'll thank me for this, gentlemen.
In fact, I challenge you to watch the video EVEN IF you're not
necessarily thinking about going into business for yourself
full-time just yet.
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WILL YOUR FIRST DATES GO WELL...OR WILL YOU "PREVENT" SUCCESS?
A number of years back, something called the Prevent Defense came
into vogue in the National Football League.
Essentially a defensive set featuring a whopping seven defensive
backs (four is typical), the strategy was developed as a way to
"prevent" long pass plays from happening.
The theory behind the Prevent Defense is simple.
If your team is up by a touchdown or more late enough in the fourth
quarter that the opposing team's only apparent hope of a comeback
is to score very quickly on big-yardage plays, then allowing 5-8
yard runs or short passes here and there isn't going to beat you...at
least not in time.
Now in theory, at least, the Prevent Defense makes perfect sense...at
least from a statistical, scientific perspective.
There's only one problem...and it's a BIG ONE.
Time and again, teams who have used the Prevent Defense in
particularly HUGE playoff games where the entire season was on the
line have often gotten BURNED by it.
Nobody could really explain why, but soon the more seasoned coaches
began to stick to their defensive game plans in big games no matter
what (e.g. Mike Shanahan in Super Bowl XXXII)...and got MUCH better
results.
What's up with that?
By way of explanation, let's consider a particularly big game in
ANOTHER sport.
If you happened to watch Game 2 of the NBA Finals the other night
between the Dallas Mavericks and the Miami Heat, you watched a
quintessential example of the same exact dynamic behind why the
Prevent Defense tends to fail in big games.
Up by double-digits late in the game, Miami played largely with a
strategy of doing what it took NOT TO LOSE.
Meanwhile, guys on the other side like Dirk Nowitski sensed the
gravity of the situation, flat-out STEPPED UP and played with the
urgency of a champion.
Dirk and his team PLAYED TO WIN.
To some it was astounding that Dallas actually eked out the victory.
But anyone who understands the Heart Of A Champion knew otherwise.
Here it is: Whether you're playing in a Super Bowl, in the NBA
Finals or yes...out on a hot date with a smokin' hot woman you'd
better EXPECT TO SUCCEED.
If you "play" as if you're trying NOT TO LOSE, your mindset will be
too weak to carry you to a positive outcome.
You see, way too many of us as guys tend to run the Prevent Defense
on first dates.
And sure enough, we end up looking like the Miami Heat in the
fourth quarter of Game 2 out there.
We look in the mirror and tell ourselves "not to blow it" before we
leave the house.
When we get in front of this amazing 100% feminine woman who looks
capable of ANYTHING sexually, all we can think of is how NOT to
make some sort of mental or physical error that will get her to run
away from us as quickly as possible.
Further, wondering whether or not coming off as a fully sexual,
masculine creature will utterly "offend" her or not, we "play it
safe".
We trot seven defensive backs on the proverbial field and, well...we
do what we can to guard against BIG mistakes.
We keep the conversation "neuter". We talk about the weather and
entertainment news instead of taking the "risk" of flirting with
her in any way, shape or form.
And we "walk on eggshells", being very careful not to disagree with
her or present any challenge at all.
And in the end we LOSE. GAME OVER. No second date...not even an
answer to our calls.
So why do things tend to turn out that way in big-time
situations--for both pro teams AND for us?
You see, when you "play it safe" you're checking everything
EXCITING at the door.
Just like a team who plays NOT to lose you rely on statistically
"proven" tactics and "safe" strategies precisely at the time when
BOLDNESS, PURE ENERGY and utter FIRE in one's soul are
pre-requisite for "big game" success.
For the umpteen (thousandth) time: Women FOLLOW your lead.
If you EXPECT success, women will get on board with that.
If you're clearly trying NOT to fail, you won't be giving any woman
much more to focus on than what YOU'RE focused on: Failure.
So then, the next time you look in the mirror before you go out on
a date, tell yourself to give that female human being who's going
to be with you for the evening something to be EXCITED about.
Vow to yourself that you'll bring out the best in her by FULLY
EXPECTING literally everything to go well.
And last but certainly not least, remind yourself that WHEN you've
brought out the best in her you'll have equipped yourself with
everything you need to truly assess whether YOU were pleased with
her or not.
The guy who runs Prevent Defense on dates wonders whether he'll be
good enough to maintain attraction on the part of the woman he's
with.
Meanwhile, the CHAMPION assumes that same woman will adore him and
sets his purpose upon deciding whether or not SHE'S woman enough to
get a second date with him.
There's a big difference there. Just ask any Defensive Coordinator
in the NFL.
Be Good,
Scot McKay
P.S. Did you notice there was a bit longer of a time span between
newsletters this time than usual? That's because I've been doing
ALL NIGHTERS getting The Difference ready for you.
Here's the 8-minute info video on what you can expect later on this
month if you haven't seen it:
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in life (which we hope will include meeting more high quality
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