[X&Y] What To Say When Women Approach You First [Steal This]
Published: Fri, 07/08/11
X & Y COMMUNICATIONS NEWSLETTER FOR MEN
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WHAT TO SAY WHEN WOMEN APPROACH YOU FIRST
As you know, a LOT of energy is spent by guys all over the world
on figuring out how to approach women.
And lately, there's also been quite a bit of talk about the idea
of getting women to approach us FIRST.
All well and good...although I'll stand firmly by my statement
that a woman respects a man more who approaches her first...at
least under "normal" circumstances.
But hey...I'll be the first to admit that there are some bold,
spunky chicks out there who will indeed come RIGHT UP TO YOU
and strike up a conversation.
I'm not talking about your next waitress and/or flight attendant,
either.
What I mean is a woman breaking the ice with you RIGHT OUT OF THE
BLUE, maybe even surprising you a bit in the process.
So here's the big question: WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WHEN THAT
HAPPENS?
Have you ever even thought about it?
Well, by now you know that I'm not particularly big on "openers"
or "pick-up lines", at least as most people understand and define
them.
But geez, dude. If a woman "opens" YOU, the very first word out
of your mouth had better not be "duh"...right?
So it's an EXCELLENT idea to have an INSTANT response that's ready
to go--on demand--if and when a woman starts a conversation with
you.
This exact topic actually came up in a coaching call the other night,
and here's a pretty-much foolproof one that even a caveman could
manage to spit out:
"Well, congratulations. You found a great excuse to start a
conversation with me."
As simple and elegant as the statement is, it combines confidence,
playfulness, well-placed approval (without overwhelm), and is
NOT too wordy.
In one simple motion you've welcomed her to help her feel safe
AND you've flirted JUST ENOUGH to make it known that you recognize
the presence of sexual polarity.
But here's the GOLDEN part of it all: In some mystical, magical
way you've ALSO exerted an unquestionable measure of LEADERSHIP and
CONTROL...even though SHE SPOKE TO YOU FIRST.
Money.
Now, no matter WHAT she says in response to you at that point, your
next move is simply to tell her your name.
Preferably, introduce yourself with the minimum two words necessary:
"I'm [Your First Name Here]."
I've figured out that it's HOT to women when guys do that as sort of
a "delayed reaction" after a conversation has already begun.
From there she'll likely introduce yourself.
What do you know? You'll have made sure that the conversation got
rolling with skill and ease instead of giving her the dreaded "deer
in the headlights look". Sweetness.
At that point, continue as you "normally" would. By the way, if that
part is tripping you up also for any reason drop me a note at:
...and set up some 1-on-1 coaching time with me.
Be Good,
Scot McKay
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