[X&Y] Women Who Are Easily Offended

Published: Sat, 05/04/13



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WHAT'S INSIDE:  A bunch of us as guys tend to be extra careful
about offending a woman when we meet her and/or when we go out on a
date with her.  Here's the VERY best reason why you can stop
worrying about that...at all.

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"OMG...I'm So OFFENDED By That"


It never fails, really.

Whenever I write to you guys with an assertive opinion--especially
on how masculinity and femininity work--I get an e-mail from at
least one woman somewhere who is absolutely appalled at me and what
I'm apparently about.

Maybe I'll post some of their feedback on the blog when I have some
spare time, because I think you might find it downright shocking.

But seriously, I would think it's fairly apparent from the
cross-section of causes I champion, truths I teach about and
especially the type of woman I have in my life that I generally
have the best interests of BOTH genders--men AND women--at heart.

And indeed, both Emily and I are all about EVERYONE winning at
dating.  This isn't about it being "Us vs. Them" or any such
gender-bashing nonsense.

So there's really little doubt, generally speaking, that I'm a guy
who thinks very highly of women and who respects them.

Nevertheless, certain women will feel compelled to write me the
most scathing, insulting messages you can imagine at times. 

Basically, I'm tantamount to Satan as they see it--and usually
representative of the fact that "all men are no good" in their
minds.

Almost invariably, the problem they're so worked up about revolves
around THEIR interpretation (or misinterpretation) of ONE PHRASE
(or even one WORD) in a newsletter they received from me that just
freakin' set them off like a Roman candle.

I rarely respond, if ever, because I fully realize who I'm dealing
with in those cases.

Nevertheless, despite my better judgment I'm almost ALWAYS tempted
to say one simple sentence to them:  "I know why you're single."

I mean, good grief.  People who get offended easily SUCK.

There I said it. 

(Now, ironically enough, watch me get "hate mail" from people who
are offended by that one too, upset because I think they suck.)

But think about how true that is for a second.  It really even
doesn't matter what gender someone is. 

If you feel like you've got to "walk on eggshells" around certain
people all the time lest they twist the next thing you say into
somehow being an affront against their very personhood, it isn't
going to be long before you stop hanging out with them.

It's just that when you find yourself actually DATING a woman who's
like that, the floodgates to "gender wars" flaring up at any
convenient opportunity seem to get thrown wide open.

And here's the truly crazy part.

Some of us as guys actually allow ourselves to get sucked in to
that brand of negativity, and end up feeling like we need to
apologize or even make up for having offended her...even when we
can't really figure out what exactly it is we did wrong.

That has more to do with our own "male guilt" than anything else,
causing us to continue believing that women are "goddesses" who are
infallible.

But meanwhile, the truth is that you really do have the power to
change how you deal with a woman who seems to get offended by
anything and everything she can conveniently shake her fist at.

Now let me be perfectly clear here.

If you find yourself feeling personally insulted by relatively
minor things--even things that are more general in nature than aimed
squarely at you--it's not like you don't have the RIGHT to feel that
way.

It's just that you SUCK to be around. 

So as long as you exercise your right to be offended, others can
(and should) exercise their right to find friends who are more
easy-going than you.

I just heard someone say, "But I AM easy-going...how DARE you assume
I'm not!  You know nothing about me!"

Yeah...sure.  Have it your way.  Just do so without me along for the
ride.  Sheesh.

You know, though, even if you only get offended when someone levels
a very real insult toward you, your race, your gender, etc. you may
have a much more VALID reason to be offended.

That's absolutely true.

But you STILL suck.

The truth of the matter is that no-thanks to today's "politically
correct" post-modern world, more people are more offended by
sillier stuff (and more of it) than ever before.

And unfortunately, I'm sorry to say, it therefore follows logically
that more people SUCK than ever before.

Simply put, the more easy-going you are--no matter what--the more fun
you're going to be to hang around.

AND...as a man, the LESS you tolerate women who are easily
offended--let alone carry the blame for them--the more you're going
to enjoy your dating life.

The more easily the woman in your life is offended, the more DRAMA
and other relational trouble you're going to have with her.

So definitely take it easy yourself.  Laugh a little.  Don't be
quite so concerned about someone "stereotyping" you,
"disrespecting" you or whatever.  

Save that energy for when the chips are really down, which is
almost never.

That is to say, be careful to defend against being offended.

What's more, find a woman who matches up with you in that regard. 

Both are decidedly better for your long-term health.   Deserve what
you want.


Be Good,

Scot McKay




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