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WHAT'S INSIDE:  What kind of guy is going to ultimately end up with
a woman like Kim Kardashian?  Here's my surprising answer...

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HAVE THE "WHOLE PACKAGE"


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From now on whenever you hear that dating is "just a numbers
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Let other guys worry about that stuff.  You'll be too busy meeting
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LETTER FROM A READER


Scot,

I don't even know if this is worth asking but can you write a
newsletter on what kind of man would be right for Kim Kardashian?
 
Is she even what you consider a high quality woman?
 
She is not someone that I would go for personally.  She is great to
look at but there is something missing.

It looks like Kanye is going to go ahead and become her third
husband, but I can't help but think he's in for some trouble.
 

Thanks a million,
 
Isaac  (US Army, Afghanistan)



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Hello Isaac:

Thanks for writing, and please stay safe over there in Afghanistan.
 
Man, by now you and everyone else reading probably knows that I
typically avoid talking about celebrity relationships unless
there's a REALLY good reason to. 

I'm just not big-time into reading tabloids, and I tend to think
most other dudes aren't either.

But for some reason I like how you presented your question...and YES,
it's worth asking.

Here's the simple answer:  I'm pretty sure that the ONLY man who
would be "right" for Kim Kardashian is one who'd be willing to
SETTLE for a relationship with her.

There it is...out on the table.

I agree with you 100% that even though she's inarguably easy on the
eyes, any guy who gets involved with her is going to be in for a
rough deal in just about every other way imaginable. 

Now listen, I'm not going to make any wholesale value judgments
against Ms. Kardashian because I personally do not know her.

In other words, like Kanye himself, "I ain't sayin' she's a
golddigger."

And really, it's not actually necessary to go there anyway.

Regardless of her personality type, how easy or difficult she is to
get along with, how self-absorbed she may or may not be and/or even
what the content of her character is the simple truth remains the
same:  She is NOT going to be easy to have a meaningful
relationship with.

The deal is what it is.  She's a VERY public person, and the simple
fact that she's "out there" so famously is a HUGE obstacle for any
guy who's not super-human to overcome.

Last I checked, that leaves NOBODY who can reasonably expect to
handle it successfully.

But most guys--even NFL running backs, NBA power forwards and
hip-hop megastars--are very susceptible to being "clouded by
beauty-vision".

Wow...we happen across a woman who is SO SEXY and we involuntarily
find ourselves wanting her SO BADLY that all rational thought goes
out the window.

(For what it's worth, gentlemen, this is NOT a gender-specific
thing.  When you succeed at igniting a woman's femininity in a
massive way, she might possibly be foolish enough to go for you
regardless of whether YOU'RE good for HER or not.  Food for
thought...)

Anyway, it's when we cease being rational with MOTOS (members of
the other sex) that things tend not to end well.

Now granted, whether Kim Kardashian is RIGHT for any particular guy
at the personal level is most certainly a crucial factor.

When we go after a woman without any regard whatsoever as to
whether she's even compatible with us or not, we're doing neither
her NOR ourselves any favors.

Even though the arguments and anguish start early and often we
might rationalize the situation.  "After all", we say to ourselves,
"it all HAS to work out...she's too HOT to let go of."

But nevertheless, the content of any woman's character DOES have
everything to do with whether she's going to be one-half of a great
relationship or not.

If we find things out about her that we just can't come to grips
with we're going to struggle...all the way until the whole thing
crashes to the ground.

But "beauty-vision" tends to keep us from ever stopping to think
that it might have been a good idea to sort all of that out BEFORE
falling head first for her.

What's more, however, in the specific case of Hollywood
relationships (like ANY relationship with Kim Kardashian will be;
past, present or future) being "clouded by beauty-vision" often
causes a man to completely overlook the very important factor of
what it's going to be like to be under the public's collective
microscope 24/7/365.

And geez, it's not like wrapping up that whole scenario in a
top-rated reality show is going to HELP matters, right?

Add it all up and it's virtually impossible to expect that ANY
relationship can survive the viciously destructive combination of
"beauty-vision" and a high level of public scrutiny.

Welcome to why SO MANY famous women with extreme physical beauty
and/or who inspire immense sexual desire lead such MISERABLE lives.

Marilyn Monroe comes to mind.  I also remember an interview several
years ago with Britney Spears where she was crying like a baby
about how terrible it is to live her life.

So here's the bottom line. 

When ANY of us who are "big four" men encounters a beautiful sexy
woman, we've GOT to have the wherewithal to first remember that
women who are sexually desirable are NOT in short supply. 

There are more of them to go around than there are men who are
masculine, confident protectors of high character.

NEVER forget that.  They're NOT all "reserved for rock stars
and celebrities" just because they're highly desirable.

Heck, let those guys deal with the female versions of themselves,
right?

Whoever she is, if a woman is NOT of high character she WILL NOT
bring you happiness in the end.

And if you do find yourself falling into the trap of getting hot
for a stripper, model or even a Hollywood actress you'd better add
the additional layer of consideration as to whether or not you're
ready (and willing) to withstand the IMMENSE social pressure and
mental gymnastics that comes with that.

(Don't even get me started on strippers, by the way.  If you think
that's the only "sexual" women are the ones who appear that way
publicly, call me right away for a 1-on-1 coaching session.)

As for me personally, I'd MUCH rather have a woman who is beautiful
and sexy on the inside AND out...and who is content to lead a much
more privately fulfilling life together.

Maximum personal satisfaction with minimum external complication is
an excellent formula for true happiness.


Be Good,

Scot McKay




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