[X&Y] She Says, "Are You Asking Me Out?" (Or Worse, "Is This A Date?")
Published: Wed, 07/15/20
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WHAT'S INSIDE: Have you ever gathered the courage to ask a woman
out, only to have her leave you speechless with one simple question?
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I KNOW WHY YOU'RE FRUSTRATED BY ONLINE DATING (OR
HAVE EVEN QUIT)...
...And here it is:
You THINK you're being interesting and creative, but to women
you're no different than every other anonymous guy on there.
There. I said it. And it's the freaking truth.
And it's not just you, it's the WOMEN also.
Every one of them looks great in jeans or a little black dress, wants
to go to Machu Picchu and doesn't want to "play games".
Why is almost everyone still DATELESS online?
Obviously, it's because nobody has any idea who they'd really,
actually connect with.
And apps only make the whole situation worse.
I'll just throw it on the table...
...Once you make TWO CHANGES to how you go about online
dating, you start WINNING where every other stubborn guy up
there keeps LOSING.
And I'm not going to keep you in suspense.
Those two changes are, in plain English:
1) You have to STAND OUT from the generic masses
and...
2) You have to boldly CALL OUT the kind of woman you
want.
Hint: If you have anything in your profile that is even remotely
close to, "I'm just a normal guy looking for an average girl. You
don't have to be a supermodel or anything." you're ALREADY
screwed.
And not in the pleasurable way.
So why am I so freely giving these truths away, when every other
dating advice newsletter never seems to offer ANY value, only
an annoying tease-fest?
That's simple.
If it was obvious how to STAND OUT and CALL OUT like I mentioned
above, every Joe Schmoe and his brother would have it figured out.
It's NOT obvious.
But it's not necessarily difficult, either.
After an honest-to-goodness fifteen years having been immersed in
this field, I have composed every secret you need to bypass YEARS
of tedious trial-and-error.
I can hand you the direct, linear roadmap to wild success...all with
step-by-step simplicity.
The combination of Online Dating Domination and The Projection
Profile is what separates men who get ALL the women online while
all other men quit in frustration.
Right now I want to give you ODD 3.0 for 50% off, and I'll also give
you The Man's Approach for free so you can meet women offline
as well:
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Seriously, gentlemen. No more dinking around and no more
complaining about how online dating "sucks".
I've heard it all, and I'm as sick of hearing it as you are sick
of saying it.
But for less than the cost of one irritating dinner date with a women
who utterly misrepresented herself, you get this handled.
From now on you're the one showing up at social functions with
stunning, show-stopping women.
From now on it will be YOUR buddies who ask in hushed tones
how the hell you have a different impossibly sexy woman by your
side every time they see you.
Don't be surprised when you "JBF" a few of those women due
to the sheer number of better options, your friends half-jokingly
ask for their phone numbers.
Sound like a bit much? Don't kid yourself...that's exactly how it
was for me that last year or so before I ultimately met Emily.
As you know, I'm no "natural" in the looks department.
What I did WORKS. And twelve years after meeting Emily
and starting X & Y Communications all I can say is I'd be
five or ten times better at online dating now than I was
then.
Online Dating Domination earned its name for a reason.
When you acquire it you can expect to:
1) Run a search for the hottest women in your entire city
2) E-mail your top ten
3) Hear back from nearly all of them
4) Move seamlessly to meeting them in person
5) Play "keep away" from every other guy who sent the same
women an e-mail but heard nothing but crickets and pins dropping
in return.
Go ahead. Do what I did. Figure this out and watch the tables turn
in dramatic fashion.
The HUGE advantage you have over me, however, is you don't have
to figure it out for yourself:
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Make your move within the next 48 hours and get the entire plan that's
100% guaranteed to get women off of your computer screen and into
your world...all for less than the price of your last bad date.
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WHAT TO DO WHEN SHE SAYS, "ARE YOU ASKING ME OUT?"
There are certain phrases women can drop on us that stop most guys
dead in their tracks. Perhaps one of the most infamous tends to
occur right when we're attempting to make plans with a woman who we
have a romantic interest in.
Typically, what we do in those situations is suggest that the woman
"hang out" with us, or that we "get coffee".
And all too often, the woman comes right out with, "Are you asking
me out?"
Face it, if you're like I always used to be you're flat-out
paralyzed in the moment by the question. And man, doesn't it just
irk you to know end?
I mean, how's a guy supposed to keep his interest subtle and his
moves casual when she just throws everything out on the table like
that?
And more importantly, how in the world are we supposed to ANSWER
that question? It's a clear "pattern interrupt" to your mojo.
Why do women DO that...and so often, no less?
Well, here's the thing. My guess is that most of us think that
women do that with the intention of getting the usual result:
Knocking us off our game.
It's easy to think that because we've just had the process of
asking a woman out made more difficult by the woman who we'd like
to go out with, that she's TRYING to derail us.
At best we see it as a frustrating "test" of some sort. But at
worst, we assume she's already communicating lack of interest.
And yes, if she's demonstrating clearly distasteful body language
that may be the case.
But see, here's what I believe based on what I've seen.
Nine times out of ten, the woman has found whatever indirect or
subtle method you're using to make plans with her just as irksome
as you're now finding her inquisitive response to be.
Your subtlety in the name of lessening the possibility for
"rejection" in the moment has only served to confuse her. She
can't tell what's really on your mind, so she's forced to ASK.
Think about that for a second. It's not that she's got some
ulterior motive. She simply wants to know if you're really,
seriously asking her out or not.
A subtle variation on the theme is, of course, "Is this a date?" A
woman may ask that question in lieu of, "Are you asking me out?", or
it may come up when you're already out with her.
Either way, she's probably asking the question because SHE ISN'T
SURE. Look closely and you'll see slight confusion or even
tentative excitement written all over her face, not disgust.
Add all of this up, and the reality of it all is crystal clear.
You've got to pick one road or the other.
Do you want to continue operating beneath a shroud of confusion
when making plans with women--thereby dreading "the question" in
whichever form it comes in?
Or would you rather not have to deal with awkwardness in that
moment ever again?
If the latter, there's an all-conquering solution: Boldness.
If you've been hearing, "Are you asking me out?" from time to time
it's because ONE or BOTH of you is too timid to be straight up
about your intentions.
To be honest, most of the time it's happens in response to our own
timid leadership.
Few guys seem to have the stones to clearly tell a woman that they
like her, are interested in her and would like to see her Thursday
night at 7pm.
But then again, it's also not beyond the realm of possibility that
the woman is a bit overwhelmed by the idea of you being interested
in her.
In other words, maybe she's asking "the question" because it all
seems too good to be true to HER.
Is your self-image strong enough to accept that distinct
possibility?
No matter what the psychological reasons are for a woman wondering
aloud if you're asking her out, your response should be the same.
You definitely want to deliver a bold, resolute AFFIRMATIVE answer
when called out.
A calm, cool, collected "yes" is all you need.
In fact, the more you try to elaborate and/or defend why you're
asking her out in that context the worse off you'll be. You'll
only come off as unsure of yourself.
And for sure, you don't want to backpedal, let alone back off
completely.
You've already come this far, why destroy the opportunity
altogether...especially if she's actually excited to go out with you?
The next time you're confronted with the kind of scenario we're
discussing here, I invite you to go ahead, jump off the ledge, and
confirm your intentions toward her with a solid "yes".
Not only can I assure you that "the question" is almost always a
good sign, you'll feel terrific when she's excited to make plans
with you.
There's nothing better than boldly going for what you want and
having a woman respond powerfully to it.
Be Good,
Scot McKay
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