[X&Y] 3 Steps To Valentine's Day (And POST V-Day) Success
Published: Fri, 02/05/21
WHAT'S INSIDE: This weekend you'll either have this mindset, or
you'll completely miss out on meeting a bunch of women.
you'll completely miss out on meeting a bunch of women.
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DOMINATE YOUR METRO AREA...AND THEN JUST KEEP
ON WINNING
ON WINNING
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3 STEPS TO VALENTINE'S DAY AND POST-VALENTINE'S
DAY SUCCESS
DAY SUCCESS
Have you heard the good news?
It really is true that the week or so after Valentine's Day
represents an even BIGGER opportunity to meet women
than the week or so BEFORE February 14th.
It's like cash money.
Many women are busy looking for a date in the days
leading up to Valentine's Day, for sure.
But what if they don't FIND ONE? What if their social calendar
is empty...and there's still NOTHING going on in the near
future?
Here's the plain truth: Unless a woman is one of the relatively
few who is already in a blissfully happy relationship, all she can
probably think about right now is what a disaster her dating life
is.
As a matter of fact, it might be really eating her up that she
doesn't have a date, let alone a steady boyfriend.
And what do we as human beings (regardless of gender) tend
to want when we're experiencing something painful?
We want to get rid of that pain, don't we?
Ah...well guess what, my good friend? YOU may be the
bearer of that magic elixir that cures all for the woman of
your choice.
That's right. I said "woman of your choice".
Don't kid yourself, even for a second. It's not at all like every
amazing woman on Earth is already in one of those
aforementioned "blissfully happy relationships".
You have such a ridiculous bounty of beauties before you
this time of year that it's almost mind-bending to think about.
Here's a hint: If she's still ACTIVE on a dating site or app
right now, she's already sweating about how Valentine's
Day weekend is going to shape up for her.
Every lasting, blasting one of them is DYING to meet a guy
and be asked out.
So how about it? Are YOU going to be the "knight in shining
armor" who rescues a terrific woman (or three) from dateless
distress?
You can and should be. But it's FAR, FAR more likely to
happen if you follow these three practical steps:
1) KNOW HER MINDSET
Above and beyond everything I've told you so far, let's cut to
the chase.
If a woman is officially "single and looking" right now, you
can virtually rest assured she doesn't have any guy in her
life whatsoever who "does it" for her...at all.
That goes double for when the calendar hits February 15th.
I mean, think about it. If there WAS a guy around for her to go
out with, she would be all set.
If she has so much as been out on a date that went well lately,
she's probably thinking more about the second date than
about checking her online dating messages, right?
So in other words, what's racing through her head about now is
pretty much the painful reality I've described at the beginning.
Importantly, this translates to the breathtaking reality that
EVERY woman who's been "active recently" (or "active now",
obviously) on sites like Match.com or OKCupid could really,
really use some positive reinforcement.
That's right. Right about now, you have ZERO pre-existing
"competition" when it comes to getting their attention online
...as in, ALL of their attention.
2) WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T MENTION THAT YOU'RE
SEEKING TO RESCUE HER FROM NOT HAVING A DATE
ON V-DAY
SEEKING TO RESCUE HER FROM NOT HAVING A DATE
ON V-DAY
Most guys are trying to leverage the "Valentine's Day
funk" in some tangible way.
This translates into first messages to women online--or even
"openers" with women in real life--that objectively suppose
that things aren't going well for her right now...
...or as of next week, didn't go well for her by the 14th.
Examples:
"So hey, I see you're still online. I guess you didn't meet the
man of your dreams yet for Valentine's Day this year."
"Another Valentine's Day came and went...so what do you say
you and I get a head start on making it better next year?"
you and I get a head start on making it better next year?"
"Looks like we've got something in common...we both didn't
have Valentine's Day work out as planned, huh?"
have Valentine's Day work out as planned, huh?"
In her mind, if she goes out with a guy next weekend--any
guy--she'll have "salvaged" Valentine's Day.
But that doesn't change that she'll still be FRUSTRATED
going forward if that date didn't go as well as hoped.
I know, I know. It's a strange psychological dynamic, isn't it?
On one hand, V-day sucks...IN THE MOMENT.
BUT...on the other hand, if she has a date (with you) in
the near future, all will be wonderful in the universe.
Your job is to make the happiness happen, NOT to remind
her of how miserable she felt until YOU "rescued" her.
That would feel patronizing to her, and like any other
human she'll feel some backlash toward those thoughts
and feelings.
Obviously, you don't want to get anchored to that mindset.
So don't remind her of it.
Frankly, you don't even have to spell out what's causing
the "funk". You can rest assured it's there. We all know
the deal.
So then, what DO you write to her instead in that first
e-mail, or say to her when you see her in that coffee
shop?
Here's the disarmingly simple answer: You write or say
exactly what you would if it were any other day.
That's right, proceed as normal.
Keep your head about you instead of blurting out some
trite "post Valentine's day" cliche, and just quietly expect
startlingly positive results unlike what you've seen before.
Believe me, women will respond voraciously to your
attention, all without you having to call out why that is.
Valentine's Day is "water under the bridge" after next
weekend anyway.
It'll make her feel much warmer and fuzzier toward you
if you point her toward the soon-to-be-springlike future
(i.e. good) rather than past consternation (i.e. bad).
3) DON'T WORRY ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED (OR DIDN'T)
ON VALENTINE'S DAY
ON VALENTINE'S DAY
Consider this to be kind of like a "don't ask / don't tell" policy.
Don't ask her who she went out with. If it happened,
it didn't go well if she's still consuming online dating profiles
like Ms. Pac Man.
And certainly don't ask her why she's still dateless in mid-
February.
Don't volunteer why you are, either.
None of those conversations will end well for you.
In fact, it's a great idea to get outside of your own head in
general here.
Bear in mind that what I'm sharing with you today is fairly
advanced thinking. Even though you've now been armed
with this "insider's view" into what's all going on in her head,
she probably hasn't.
So in other words, she's NEVER going to think of YOU as
having "failed" on Valentine's Day when you show interest
in her.
Why? Because she'll likely be too wrapped up in her own
self- perceived Valentine's Day "failure" to get around to
that.
Besides, she'll be hard-wired to hold great expectations
that you're the amazing guy you truly are who'll sweep her
off of her feet...and away from the pain.
Again, February 15th is no different than any other day.
You'll only look needy and desperate if YOU choose to
make it so.
So let's wrap this up.
In summary, the three steps to post-Valentine's Day success
are:
1) Know what's going on in her head,
2) Stay mum about Valentine's Day and proceed as you
would on any other day, and
3) Drop any self-conscious concern over your own crappy
Valentine's Day experience. Both of you have a nice
turn of events ahead of you, at least potentially.
These three steps really sound incredibly basic, don't
they?
They are.
But the crazy part is that if you follow them you'll be light
years ahead of virtually every other guy out there who
somehow never thought them through on his own.
And that's exactly what makes these three steps pure
gold, even if they're "no-brainers".
Be Good,
Scot McKay
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